Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Death & Dying
/ Widows & Widowers Support Group

4 Year Anniversary

QPXZ
QPXZ
I have been on the depression and bereavement boards and someone told me to check out this board. Today is the 4 year anniversary of my fiancee Stephen's death. I thought I would be in a better place by now. I have read some posts here. I still have his clothes and have been giving away some stuff but not happy about it. My life has been so much worse and it is hard to cope. I know there will never be another man because my block is full of widows and single moms and so on. Some say they are fine without a man and others I know would love to be in a relationship. Tonight some friends are having me over but I know it is because they are lonely single woimen like me who want company and this is there excuse. they are even buying a cake and I feel it is like celebrating his death and feel very uncomfotable about that. I would just rather watch an old movie and go to bed early and this will just make me feel worse. I am reliving the day and yesterday. I am thinking of going on antidepressants but it is my life that is terrible. Like I said I have read some posts and feel like I can relate. It is a terrible thing to lose the one you love. I read some posts about your spouses and I know they live in yout hearts like Stephen does although I would rather have him here like you.

QP
soojin
soojin
You have definitely found the right group. Yes, I am in the same position as you, however only 8 1/2 months out. I wear his clothes everyday, will NOT give one more thing away. I since have not only lost my family but financial stability as well, so is life that terrible? I can't answer that for you. Most DON'T understand how we feel. Everything that you're feeling, I think is normal. A love as great as ours that we have found, each does their own thing but when it comes right down to it, they will FOREVER live on through us. I would much rather have the 39 year old man of my dreams by my actual side everyday and I can't wait to be able to see him again. That is the only hope in me that I have left ....
tlsom
tlsom
So glad you found this group...wish you had found it sooner. We get it when most others do not. There are several here that lost heir husband to a heart attack with no warning like you. We all get the loss, the pain, etc...we are here for you!
QPXZ
QPXZ
Thank You. Yesterday was rough. I know my friends were thinking of me and just wanted me to feel better and it was an escape but I was sad when I got home and remembering that awful day. People say that Stephen would have hated being sick and he even would say that he would rather die of a heart attack rather than being sick for years like my parents but I am sure he thought it would be later in life and not so soon but it is really hard on the ones left behind. I would rather him be with me like all of you also. I hope things get better for you Soojin. It is hard enough to deal with the pain without financial problems and other losses. I have those also and we are expected and heve to go on which is so tough. That we see them again is the only hope also. People don't get it unless they have been through it. I remember when he died I said no one should have to go through this. I wish none of us had to.

QP
BCHRISTINA
BCHRISTINA
Hi, u see, I told you this group would be great for you. We are the only people that get it. Come as often as you need. Ive read your postings + journal and I know is hard to believe, but it must be a light in the end of the tunnel. God does have good plans and a hope for us.
Hang in there. His death can NOT lead to ours, as much as we all would choose that. His death should lead to life. We should live to honor their dreams. xx
:)
QPXZ
QPXZ
Thank You for referring me here. I have to have hope and it is hard but it is the only thing that keeps me going. Some days it is harder to believe harder that things will ever get better but I know with people like you here to remind me it lifts my spirits.

QP