Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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praised 01/18/2014

Today I went to Grief Support Group at our church for the first time. They meet every third Saturday and I have been on this website since August. I tried not to critique in my mind and I enjoyed being face to face to others who are grieving, but I have learned so much on this site that I could have done this workshop. The sharing I really enjoyed and was surprised to see some members whom I didn't know had lost loved ones. Each new person was given a booklet on grieving by H. Norman Wright and some printed information. I came away feeling that I did not get what I get here. One thought came to mind that this is specifically for widows and widowers, and at the meeting there were people who has lost other members of their family. One young man touched me. He lost his wife of 32 years on December 19th. They were high school sweethearts at 14 and 15. They married young, because he is only 50. I told him about this site. Hopefully he will visit. Thank you so much for your wisdom, your encouragement and for your patience. God bless you all.

Rosepa 01/18/2014

I too have been going to a bereavement group at church. It meets every other week. I also was coming to this site before they started their sessions and feel like I could run the meeting. I go because it gets me out of the house but I get more comfort and support from reading the posts on here.

matthew90 01/18/2014

I agree totally. There is no better place to be than here. I, also go to a mixed support group, and have become close with several members. It is nice to talk face to face or on the phone in addition to this community, but far more support is available from the wealth of experience and compassion from the people on this site. Robert

deleted_user 01/19/2014

I have been looking for a support group in a local church. My biggest fear is that they will not have enough people that have lost a spouse. I feel that I need that connection. That's why I like it here. I would like some face time with other people. I feel that God will lead me where I need to be.

Robbie

BandiBlue 01/19/2014

I have also looked for a grief support group in my area (PA) The only one available is not exactly what I am looking for. The next closest one is an hour away, so that's not feasible either.

But the "Widows & Widowers" group here on DS is right here in my own home, and available 24 hours a day. I think I've found the best resource for me at this time!

gerald222 01/19/2014

I have been to several groups. One that was for widow/widowers only I found worked best. I did a mixed one that had remarkable people but it wasnt the same. One group didnt work at all for me. Trial and error. The wonderful thing about DS is we can access it 24/7. As we know grief can hit at anytime. I know alot of what I learned here is repeated in the grief support groups. One group I coffee with once a month informally and that has proved to be very beneficial. DS has been my foundation through this journey. Gerald

Patriciavara 01/19/2014

I have gone to a support group that was affiliated with my health plan. They meet twice a month, but I have only been there twice now. It seems that there is more time spent on just getting to know everyone, with no real guidance as to how to get through this tragedy in our lives. I have found this site to be most helpful, everyone can speak their minds without being in front of an audience. You can be yourself. I didnt feel comfortable at first, expressing my inner thoughts and pouring out my soul. The fact that you are reaching out shows you are stronger. Reaching out here is what truly has made my life worth living happily again. take care ....Patricia

deleted_user 01/19/2014

I think that the best support groups are those that are specific to the kind of loss -- as this site is for those who have lost a husband or wife. My husband and I lost our son to suicide a dozen years ago. We went to a few bereavement groups, but didn't really find the help we were seeking until we joined one that was for those who whose loved ones had taken their own lives. We were hurting so much, and that group was a haven for us.

My husband died last March, and I haven't joined an in-person support group. I can't find one for widows/widowers that is close to me, and I don't know that I have the energy and resolve to actually go if I did find one. Thank goodness for this site. I often feel so alone in my grief, and this site has helped me more than I can say. Here, you can read, vent, cry, and ask for help from wherever you are.

Thank you to all here who share, empathize, and lend much needed support,
DorothyJoan

praised 01/19/2014

As I said it meets very third Saturday, so I am going again, just to see if a different topic is presented. I have gained so much to help me cope emotionally.

cliffskat 01/21/2014

I want to thank you for your comments about this group. I know it means a lot to Sharon, Marsha, and myself to hear that you all are getting something out of being here on DS.

I couldn't get to any face-to-face meetings when Cliff died - there was no one to look after my sons in the evenings. So I searched online and wound up here, and that was 6+ years ago. Being here changed my life in so many ways.

I am glad being here is helping people.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

praised 01/21/2014

I started reading this booklet given to us at the support workshop called "Experiencing Grief by H Norman Wright." It is very interesting, 85 pages with 25 chapters. It was written by a man who has gone through what we are experiencing and he really delves into all facets which affects us. I will probably finish it today, as I am drawn into what the next chapter will say.

NutritionMagician 01/21/2014

I've been debating whether or not I want to attend a face to face support group. I know grief comes in all shapes and sizes, but I feel like I am afraid of being an "odd person out". I'm 24, and lost my boyfriend to suicide. This site has connected me to a lot of people that have shared experiences. Being so busy, I'm not sure I want to do it yet (plus it's been incredibly cold here and all the groups are at night). I think for now I will stick with my individual counselor and DS.

deleted_user 01/21/2014

I agree that this group is helpful because it is for those who've lost a spouse. I can't find a local support group that works, actually found one locally but it doesn't start for a month yet. Anyway, I like online because I can be here when I want. I'm finding I need a lot of interaction, so I really appreciate when others respond. I live far from family and am pretty lonely, plus I have some complex financial issues I didn't expect to face alone.

Appreciate you all.

sandeestttn 01/21/2014

I went to grief support group, there were 3 of us there. ages, 87, 78, and 64(me)... they said I was to young for their group? there was no, interaction between people, the counselor was there, and I felt like I was intruding, just listening to them cry....the 87 yr olds husband died 6 years ago, she acted like it just happened. the 78 yr old, a month before mine did. I didn't return after the 2nd time.

gerald222 01/21/2014

In my travels trying different groups the one thing I forgot to mention is by far the best group was one facilitated by a widow themselves. They werent just book smart they traveled the journey. Gerald

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