Twins, Triplets & More Support Group
Triplets & More","This community connects people seeking information and experiences about multiple births. Different names for multiple birth are used, depending on the actual multiple. Common multiples are two and three, known as twins and triplets respectively. Share your thoughts and find whatever support you need."
Difficulty getting rid of baby stuff
kris10g
After 3 years of infertility, my husband and I had twins via In-vitro fertilization. We have a six year old son, and a miraculous pregnancy with my due date coming in April. Our family feels complete with 4 kids and we don't plan on having any more.
Has anyone else had a difficult time getting rid of baby stuff? My husband's sister has a 6 year old boy, a husband who has been deported and has a 10 year ban from entering the U.S., and she is living with her parents being supported by them and the government. Over the holidays, she and her son visited her husband for 6 weeks. She went there with the intention of getting pregnant and she did just that! It's so frustrating that she has the mindset that she can just go and get pregnant because the government will pay for it. Now she thinks that she is entitled to all my baby stuff! She doesn't take care of anything and I know anything I give to her will be trashed. She keeps making the comment that if it's a girl, she's going to have to get my baby girl clothes. Her mom has offered to pay us for the clothes, but I just don't know if I am ready to get rid of my baby clothes.
Does that sound weird since I know that I am done having kids? I feel like they just think they are entitled to my stuff, and I appreciate that they are willing to buy the clothes, I just hate that I feel like they are forcing this on me. Maybe it's the fact that I struggled with infertility for so long or that I only have the one daughter (the other 3 are boys) and I just can't stand the thought of giving them something that won't be taken care of. My mom has also made it clear that anything she bought, she would like to keep and save for her other grand kids.
Am I being selfish? I personally think that my sister-in-law has no business having more kids when she can't take care of them financially. Why should my husband and I supply everything for her? We are still recovering from the cost of IVF, we're about to have 3 kids in diapers, and we pay for our own medical insurance and food, unlike her.
Any advice on the nicest way I can politely say no? Is it weird that I'm just not ready to get rid of my stuff, especially my baby girl clothes? I know I will do it someday, but I want it to be on my own time. Then again, it's just stuff, is it worth potentially harming my relationship with my in-laws? I feel so selfish thinking about it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Has anyone else had a difficult time getting rid of baby stuff? My husband's sister has a 6 year old boy, a husband who has been deported and has a 10 year ban from entering the U.S., and she is living with her parents being supported by them and the government. Over the holidays, she and her son visited her husband for 6 weeks. She went there with the intention of getting pregnant and she did just that! It's so frustrating that she has the mindset that she can just go and get pregnant because the government will pay for it. Now she thinks that she is entitled to all my baby stuff! She doesn't take care of anything and I know anything I give to her will be trashed. She keeps making the comment that if it's a girl, she's going to have to get my baby girl clothes. Her mom has offered to pay us for the clothes, but I just don't know if I am ready to get rid of my baby clothes.
Does that sound weird since I know that I am done having kids? I feel like they just think they are entitled to my stuff, and I appreciate that they are willing to buy the clothes, I just hate that I feel like they are forcing this on me. Maybe it's the fact that I struggled with infertility for so long or that I only have the one daughter (the other 3 are boys) and I just can't stand the thought of giving them something that won't be taken care of. My mom has also made it clear that anything she bought, she would like to keep and save for her other grand kids.
Am I being selfish? I personally think that my sister-in-law has no business having more kids when she can't take care of them financially. Why should my husband and I supply everything for her? We are still recovering from the cost of IVF, we're about to have 3 kids in diapers, and we pay for our own medical insurance and food, unlike her.
Any advice on the nicest way I can politely say no? Is it weird that I'm just not ready to get rid of my stuff, especially my baby girl clothes? I know I will do it someday, but I want it to be on my own time. Then again, it's just stuff, is it worth potentially harming my relationship with my in-laws? I feel so selfish thinking about it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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