Trying To Conceive Support Group
Whether you are just beginning your journey to create your family, or you have been trying for a few months, the TTC community will provide you with a group of like minded people who can help. It takes up to a year for the average fertile couple to achieve a successful pregnancy, and here at DailyStrength you will find information and support while you are waiting for...
I am new to this site, and I am happy that I found it. My husband and I have been TTC our first baby since July 2013. I remember it being so exciting to know we are trying to create another human! I apologize for this post being so long, but it is my first one and I need to vent a little.
In our group of friends, as well as family, everyone was able to get pregnant on their first or second try. Over the course of us trying to get pregnant, we have seen several friends give birth, and get pregnant a second time! We even have a couple friends who accidentally got pregnant.
We want so so badly to be parents, but things have been tough. My husband started working out of town last year (away for 2 weeks, home for a week). So we knew it may take a bit more time to conceive than most. We were ecstatic when my husband found out he got a job working at home for a few months! He was home for about 5 months total, and we still did not conceive.
When I first went off the pill, my cycles were all over the place. 5 weeks...6 weeks...I even had one that was 8 weeks! Finally, starting in January of this year I had a 31 day cycle, and they have all consistently been 31 days. I was very happy to see my body had finally figured itself out and got me onto a regular cycle.
I have been doing charting, and when my husband was home last it coincided perfectly with ovulation! Let me tell you how excited I was when I was late (as of yesterday I was 9 days late!). I was on cloud 9! Especially because when I would be testing (my hubs always has said he would like to be with me when I take preg tests so we can share the joy together) would be on my birthday! How perfect!
However...today, halfway through my work day...Aunt Flo decided to pay her visit. I am absolutely crushed. Being 9 days late...having extremely sore breasts...and mild cramping for a week (I only ever get cramping the first day of my period) I definitely thought it was my time.
I am just reaching out to find other people to have as support through these hard times. My friends are a great source, but when all of them have been able to get pregnant several times very quickly, it is hard for them to know what to say.
Anyone out there feel my pain?
In our group of friends, as well as family, everyone was able to get pregnant on their first or second try. Over the course of us trying to get pregnant, we have seen several friends give birth, and get pregnant a second time! We even have a couple friends who accidentally got pregnant.
We want so so badly to be parents, but things have been tough. My husband started working out of town last year (away for 2 weeks, home for a week). So we knew it may take a bit more time to conceive than most. We were ecstatic when my husband found out he got a job working at home for a few months! He was home for about 5 months total, and we still did not conceive.
When I first went off the pill, my cycles were all over the place. 5 weeks...6 weeks...I even had one that was 8 weeks! Finally, starting in January of this year I had a 31 day cycle, and they have all consistently been 31 days. I was very happy to see my body had finally figured itself out and got me onto a regular cycle.
I have been doing charting, and when my husband was home last it coincided perfectly with ovulation! Let me tell you how excited I was when I was late (as of yesterday I was 9 days late!). I was on cloud 9! Especially because when I would be testing (my hubs always has said he would like to be with me when I take preg tests so we can share the joy together) would be on my birthday! How perfect!
However...today, halfway through my work day...Aunt Flo decided to pay her visit. I am absolutely crushed. Being 9 days late...having extremely sore breasts...and mild cramping for a week (I only ever get cramping the first day of my period) I definitely thought it was my time.
I am just reaching out to find other people to have as support through these hard times. My friends are a great source, but when all of them have been able to get pregnant several times very quickly, it is hard for them to know what to say.
Anyone out there feel my pain?
I can imagine how hard it is to try with the hubby away, you feel like you are being robbed of cycles. It's great that you had some time together for so long, but I wish it worked out for you.
Having a period come late is so horrible! It always shows up just at that moment you actually think "this could be it" and you plan for a test. Then, bam... the bitch comes on. And, always at work. We can never get it when we are home and we can cry alone. Urgh! I'm so sorry!
Having a good group of friends/family is so helpful. But even the best will say the wrong thing simply because they can't even come close to understanding. DS is great because everyone here has been through a lot and can be there for each other. I hope you find it helps!
Thinking of you!
I just called today and made an appointment with a doctor to get referred to a OBGYN to start getting things looked at. It is bitter sweet as I am excited ti finally get the ball rolling on things, but at the same time it makes a me a bit sad that pregnancy isn't something I have been able to do on my own without any outside help :(
I can really relate to everything your saying and it made me tear up as I was reading it. Your friends could be the best, kindest people ever but if they are pregnant or have at one time gotten pregnant without any effort, it's really hard for them to understand. It's also really hard to be a supportive friend to those having babies. For me it is at least since I have to hear my friends complaining about headaches and backaches during pregnancy and all I am thinking is I would take any ailment just to be there.
Also, I feel so upset I don't get that title "mom", but I feel as though I have been a mom for longer, since I have been preparing and trying for so much longer. But yet I'm not, and it really hurts.
But, when I reallllly try to look on the bright side, I can come up with this one point that helps me get through, and maybe it will help you too. Anything somewhat arduous is character building. It truly is. And this experience will help to shape us into better, more understanding parents. I truly believe that. And everything we are going through helps us to appreciate what we will one day have, just that little bit more.
You will have a baby. We live in lucky times, with everything available to us. It will happen. The not knowing is horrid and it hurts every day and makes every other thought or activity unenjoyable because of this huge void...but it will happen.
Can't wait to hear about it when it does :)
Thanks so much for your reply. I definitely try and keep my head held high as much as I can. And for the most part I do ok. It is really hard because it is taking so long, and we have no idea if we are even able to have children. That being said, like you mentioned, there are so many things out there to help couples TTC that pretty much every problem has a solution. Which is a really positive thought :)
It has really started to wear on me the last few months as more and more people have been asking why we haven't got pregnant yet. It honestly shocks me how many people try to make ti their business! I don't mind friends asking, who I have been sharing the journey with. But even at the clinic I work in, patients who I do not know personally on any level try and offer me their input as to why I should already have kids :S. The one thing is this has definitely made me sensitive to other people trying to have a baby, and what is and isn't ok to say. Even though people are trying to be compassionate, sometimes they don't realise how much theirs words can hurt.
So glad we aren't going through this alone :) I just cannot wait to be pregnant. Even if I knew it was for sure in 3 years, then I could let myself relax that it would eventually happen. AUGHHHH (pulls hair out).
I followed up on my doctor's referral to an OBGYN last week. They said I am still on the wait list, but that I am at the top so it shouldn't be much longer. I just want to go now so someone can tell me what the heck is going on!
I will definitely keep you guys updated on what's going on. I am hoping I don't have to wait too much longer! But the thought that something is being done about it has definitely lifted a lot of stress :)