All I can say is take a huge step back and consider cognitive behavior therapy treatment to help you be balanced with this change in your normal lifestyle.
The reason is because you can only change the way you view the situation, and not how others see it. I had to learn that I could use simple, short, sweet words to handle the questions made by those who have never suffered the pain of trigeminal neuralgia.
I am fortunate in that I learned how to deal with this from childhood, as I have hearing loss, speech impediment and so the jaw pain is easy to work with-I tell people, imagine wanting to rip your jaw out and knowing that the pain would still be there.
Hope this helps. You are not alone.

They don't really understand what we deal with. When you have a condition like TN I have found that people will sympathize with you for awhile then they are like, I don't want to hear it anymore. It is just one of the horrible factors we have to live with. I truly understand how you feel and what you are saying but others that have not been there, (are have not had a spouse that's been there), that have TN, really do not truly understand what it is like dealing with this condition. That is one reason why I love this support site. I can talk and relate to others who have to deal with this condition.
Prayers and Hugs,
Linda

I'm sorry about this added pain in your life. I and everyone on this site know your pain. Family is the one we really need our support. But they can't understand They think you should just shank it off and get on with your life. I too did not want the MVD surgery. I've read the storys on here. But I just spent 6 days in the hospital. Nothing they did help the pain. I had 4 or 5 different pain meds. Finaly a Neuro Surgon told my family he was going to give me a what they call Rhizotomy injections in my face. if I have a flare up it can be done again. My face is numb and I really don't like it but there is no pain. I am getting feeling back slowly and I'm getting off my meds. It's hard to trust it But I do know theres away out now. Theres some one on this site had it done it lasted 30 years. My husband thinks I'm cured but you and I know this is not true. I'm driving again after a year half. I did get my disability for this and my back. I hope this can help you.

Iipa, Not sure if the person was me that you read that about the injections lasting 30 years. But My Aunt and cousin both had it done and it worked for her for about 30 years. Just thought I would mention that. I am pleased with my MVD surgery, but, I have wished that I would have tried the rhizotomy injections first. It is less evasive.

A good friend of mine benefitted from treatment with the gamma Knife by a physician in Kansas City, Dr. Jonathan Chilton. He is a great neurosurgeon who treats TN. Gamma Knife is not real surgery like we think of surgery. it is completely non invasive. She had the procedure done at Research Medical Center--great care by great nurses and doctors.

Hi, I'm sorry your going through the struggle of trying to get family to understand. I'm there with you with my Mother in-law. Best of intentions. What I can share with you that you might be able to share with your sis is that I've had not one, but two MVD surgeries and both have now failed. I'm in the same pain as I was on day one. Brain surgery is A LOT to go through to get no end result. You really have to know going in that the choice was yours alone and that was exactly what YOU alone wanted to do. I'm now with you, I don't drive, I don't work and I put a lasagna in the oven the other day with the plastic cover on the casserole dish. Life goes on and we take it day by day. Lot's of luck to you with your sis.

Thank you for all your replies. I just don't understand why Family and Friends think they know the answers. I'm not asking for advice they just matter of fact give it. I have a weekend coming up with all my Cousins for girls weekend. I asked along my friend to help support me if things start to go into that direction. Wine and Martinis can get people talking. A saying I heard once from an old Irishman friend. A drunk mans words are a sober man's thoughts. I will keep my guard up and take it with a grain of salt.

I'm really sorry to hear that you are struggling with your condition and then family on top of that. As you can see, you are not alone. I have lost many friends and don't communicate with most of my family because they don't understand and I'm tired of defending my condition. I had the MVD surgery last May and although it did help relieve some of the typical symptoms I continue to suffer from the atypical constant 24/7 pain, fire poker in the cheek. I can't even get doctors to get on the same page. The surgeon who performed the MVD basically wrote that he did the surgery and all is resolved even though I have informed him that this is not the case. Clearly he doesn't want to interfere with his "statistics". It is very tiring to fight the pain and to always defend or have to explain why we feel so bad. May God Bless you and keep you well. May you find the strength to face the days ahead. Take care of YOU!!!!