Trichotillomania (Hair Pulling) Support Group
Impulsive control disorder is the inability to resist an urge, temptation, or impulse, even when it may cause negative effects to the self or to others. If you or a loved one suffers from impulsive contorl disorder, join the community to find support and share your challenges with others who know what you're going through.
For any who haven't read one of my recent posts (a couple weeks ago i think)... I have been very motivated to stop pulling because I have feelings for a guy friend of mine (he doesn't reciprocate) and he's pointed out my false eyelashes and always tells me i should not wear so much makeup. Though it has made me really self conscious, it has also really helped me fight the urges.
It's been tough just being his friend, I have debated whether or not I should stop hanging out with him. But I have this image in my mind of having alllllll my eyelashes grown back and being able to meet up with him and him seeing me for the first time without the false lashes on. Sure, I know he's not going to all of a sudden become interested, but I don't know. I still really really want to be able to say that he at least saw me once as JUST ME and nothing else. you know?
Even more painful is lately he started going on a few dates with a girl he met, and she is GORGEOUS. A model of course. And now i feel 80000 times more self-concious and 900000 times more motivated to get my eyelashes and eyebrows back. Jealousy can be a powerful motivator! haha.
It is painful sometimes, but I'm trying to come out of it stronger and channel the pain into something happy- me having my eyelashes/brows back! And maybe getting some of my confidence back too.
At the moment, my eyelashes are doing GREAT!!!!! Still need the falsies. But I have more hair right now than I have had in a very VERY long time. I'm SO excited about how far I have come and even more excited thinking of the day I can leave the house with my OWN lashes and not some fake ones!
It's been tough just being his friend, I have debated whether or not I should stop hanging out with him. But I have this image in my mind of having alllllll my eyelashes grown back and being able to meet up with him and him seeing me for the first time without the false lashes on. Sure, I know he's not going to all of a sudden become interested, but I don't know. I still really really want to be able to say that he at least saw me once as JUST ME and nothing else. you know?
Even more painful is lately he started going on a few dates with a girl he met, and she is GORGEOUS. A model of course. And now i feel 80000 times more self-concious and 900000 times more motivated to get my eyelashes and eyebrows back. Jealousy can be a powerful motivator! haha.
It is painful sometimes, but I'm trying to come out of it stronger and channel the pain into something happy- me having my eyelashes/brows back! And maybe getting some of my confidence back too.
At the moment, my eyelashes are doing GREAT!!!!! Still need the falsies. But I have more hair right now than I have had in a very VERY long time. I'm SO excited about how far I have come and even more excited thinking of the day I can leave the house with my OWN lashes and not some fake ones!
I've been on a date before were the guy I was with pointed out my false eyelashes and asked why I was wearing them, not exactly politely, and I felt like my confidence plummeted straight down and set up camp somewhere in my shoes. As far as I knew he maybe thought I had my own lashes and i was just 'high maintenance', but for the panic and upset it gave me I may as well have been sitting there with no make-up and bald upper lids completely exposed
Im also in a pretty good state of regrowth right now: but im trying to work on improving my self-confidence as a separate thing, as it makes relapses so much more painful and self-loathing if I equate 'confident, normal me' as only being possible with a full set of lashes
I also made a list after a lot of thinking, of the exact triggers why I pull (feeling socially anxious, stress, tired, hungry) so I can bear them in mind and try and fix the source of the problem BEFORE using pulling as a coping mechanism
I really hope things keep going well for you :) you should be so proud!
I had a little bit of a relapse tonight. but nothing TOO terrible. definitely feeling like my goal of having my eyelashes by my birthday in mid january was a little tooo optimistic. But i'm going to hold on to it and just understand that if I don't make the goal, it's okay to set a new one for a litttle later and to not beat myself up about it. Progress is progress, no matter how small!
I realized my main "trigger" is just being bored and alone. So far the only person I know where I live is the guy I like, so I need to make an effort to somehow meet new people so I can minimize the whole "being home alone" problem which leads to my pulling.
For christmas I asked "santa" for a keyboard piano. I used to play piano when I was younger and haven't played in years, but i think it would be a good way to distract myself from pulling if I can force myself to practice instead of pulling! Can't play piano without your hands!