Trichotillomania (Hair Pulling) Support Group
Impulsive control disorder is the inability to resist an urge, temptation, or impulse, even when it may cause negative effects to the self or to others. If you or a loved one suffers from impulsive contorl disorder, join the community to find support and share your challenges with others who know what you're going through.
Hi, I'm Bailey. I've had trich for 7 years. I'm turning 15 in September. I pull out my eyelashes & eyebrows.
I have a blogs- teenwithtrich.tumblr.com
and you can see how I'm doing on- trichjourney.tumblr.com
Comment if you've ever felt like this or have had these thoughts in relation to your trich. ::
"I am so ugly, what am I doing to myself?"
"Ew, what a freak I am."
"I am so gross. I disgust myself."
"This makes me want to hide."
"I feel as if I should just die."
"Maybe one more hair won't hurt, right?"
"I can't stop... I just can't.."
"I am hopeless."
"I'm not worth anything."
"I'm destroying myself."
"I am nothing but a wreck."
This is how I'm feeling right now.
Welllllll, Feel free to talk to me. :-)
I have a blogs- teenwithtrich.tumblr.com
and you can see how I'm doing on- trichjourney.tumblr.com
Comment if you've ever felt like this or have had these thoughts in relation to your trich. ::
"I am so ugly, what am I doing to myself?"
"Ew, what a freak I am."
"I am so gross. I disgust myself."
"This makes me want to hide."
"I feel as if I should just die."
"Maybe one more hair won't hurt, right?"
"I can't stop... I just can't.."
"I am hopeless."
"I'm not worth anything."
"I'm destroying myself."
"I am nothing but a wreck."
This is how I'm feeling right now.
Welllllll, Feel free to talk to me. :-)
lots of support here!!
And yes, I've felt all those things in relation to my trich. I'm feeling a little better right now since I've been pull-free for a couple weeks, but the bald patches are still there, and LOTS of my eyelashes are still missing.
Once you're past high school things change dramatically for the better. Maybe it's because people realize they have their own faults and that makes them more compassionate.
The thing with trich is we don't connect the pulling with the aftermath (bald spots, no eyelashes/brows). We have to agressively stop ourselves from pulling, because when it comes down to it we really like to pull.
Barriers, use barriers all the time. I stopped pulling my hair out over 3 months ago (ok, not perfect, still pull here & there but soooooooooo much better than before I found DS) and I still need to use barriers to stop my hand from going up to my head.
Baily, give yourself small goals. Like "I wont' pull for one hour". That will become 2 hours, then 4 hours and before you know it you'll be pull free for longer than you thought possible. The feeling of accomplishment will spur you on. And, if you happen to pull, just stop and tell yourself "I can do this, I CAN!" Positive thinking is a key factor in success.
Please have faith in yourself because we have faith in you!
I'm also an eyebrow and eyelash puller (for 9 years or so). Working on it! I have also felt many of those things. Usually I feel like some kind of freak, but finding this site has helped me a lot.
I saw on your blog that you're starting high school soon! I just want to say if you made it through middle school, you've conquered the worst! At least in my experience (I've heard others say this as well), high schoolers are much less judgmental. They have bigger things to think about than, "Hmm... is it just me, or does that girl not have eyelashes?" I was always afraid of having an encounter like that, but it never happened. And it gets even easier in college.
So don't lose sleep over what people will think, like I did. Chances are they won't suspect a thing. If you want to quit, do it for positive reasons (you want eyelashes and eyebrows) rather than negative (you don't want people to know you don't have them), if that makes sense! You're trying to fix this for yourself, not them!
Anyway, good luck and keep posting - we'd love to hear how you're doing! :-)
People threw things at my sister as she walked through the cafeteria in highschool, and shouted "Rogaine!" at her. I'm pretty sure she will never get over that "teasing". (I can't think of the right word for it). It sure didn't help her to stop pulling.
I've had friends and other random people notice the huge gaps in my eyelashes and say things like "oh my god, what happened to your eyelashes". Or, when I was in middle school "do you wear a wig?" (I didn't, but I assume my bald spot was showing or something). Things like that are mortifying. They make you want to crawl in a hole and disappear.
Like acceptingmyself said, it gets a LOT better once you get out of highschool. Kids are mean. That's pretty much all there is to it. It sucks.
Trich does not define you. I know it's much easier said than done, but you can stop. I'm sure you WILL stop.
you are beautiful young girl and thoughts like these will not help you get better. You are not a freak or ugly. You have the strength in you to stop trich. Head up girl!!!!! Good thoughts will bring good things.
Believe in yourself!!!!You can do it.
First, I must say: You have a very beautiful profile picture! If I only I looked half as good as you do, haha! Anyways, I too have Trich and I have a tendency to pull my eyelashes and eyebrows. I don't pull my eyebrows as much as I pull my eyelashes though. That being said, I have thought all those things, that you've described, before -- MANY times! I end up feeling like that ALL the time!
Like last night for example, I had been doing fine, and now a great big chunk is missing from my right eye (which makes the previous gap, that was there previously, even bigger than it was before). I couldn't help but think how ugly I made myself, or how disappointed I was in myself when I looked in the mirror to see the damage I had done. Trust me - you're not alone in feeling terrible or thinking all those quotes you wrote. That's one of the main reasons I joined this support group. To meet others exactly like myself ;-)
I'm sending you a big hug!