The Hen House Community Group
This Group is for Hens only. A place where we can share and flock together:) May friendships grow here.
Thought I would share with everyone what's going on. My 15 year old is in a lot of trouble. Two days ago he got caught at school with a backpack full of MJ & drug paraphernalia.
It wasn't his. A friend of his brought it to school and asked him to hold his back pack for him in his locker. My son agreed to do it. He admits he had a good idea what was in it but didn't know for sure. Someone tipped the principle off that my son's friend and my son were selling MJ......my son just by association to his friend and constant sidekick.
Now since my son is the one that got caught with it he will bear the brunt of the punishment.
He has been suspended automatically for one calendar year. I am hopping they will let him go to alternative school in 90 days ( I have to appeal this) meanwhile I will have to drive him from my town to the next town over every day and pick him up every day. It's a 30 min. Drive each way.
But that's not the worst of it. He was already on probation for hitting a kid that had been bullying him. This of course violates the probation. So, he has to go to court and I am scared to death they will send him to Juvenile detention. I can't stand the thoughts of it and it has me very upset.
I know he has to be disciplined. I know he was in the wrong for holding this stuff for his friend. And he admits that he has helped his friend sell it in the past. He does not smoke it himself. The officer himself told me that sometimes it helps kids who go to Juvenile detention but most of the time it doesn't.
Here is the thing that is breaking my heart.....he didn't help his friend for the money...to be mean, he wasn't doing it for any rebellious reason......he was doing it to have a friend. He says it s the only way kids like him is if he has something they want or do something for them. He wants friends so bad. Of course I told him that he was better off not having any friends at all than to have friends like this but you just can't tell a teen this and make him understand it. His question to me on the way home was: " why is it dad and my brother can make friends so easy and I can't"
S o he did all this just to have a friend. Yes its still wrong but as his mother I am heartbroken that he felt this was his only way to have friends.
And as a mother....the thoughts of my son being in juvenile 'jail' is killing me emotionally! I have been crying and crying over it and I am pretty sure this is what is going to happen. I am literally sick to my stomach. He is a good kid making some bad emotional choices. He is not rebellious and does not get in any other trouble with destructive kids set out to cause trouble. He did this to have friends:( And as my brother said to me ....my son is easy pray for people who are looking for someone who wants to fit in and belong to a group of friends.
Needless to say he was told his friendship with this other kid was 110% over and he would not be getting his drivers license because I did not trust him now.
So if I'm kind of scarce and/ or not very attentive, please forgive me. I'm going to be an emotional wreck for a few weeks. I have to get ahold of the school board and set up a hearing with them ASAP. And his court date is April 3 rd which is a very long time to worry!!
I could use some prayer.....God's will be done in this. And for my own mental stability. I'm having anxiety attacks and the depression is severe. I've had one breakdown a few years ago.....I can't have another one and I am a wreck right now.
Please be patient with me if I seem out of sorts, forgetful or I attentive....I love all of you and care very much about each one of you....I just have a lot of distractions going on right now and I'm having to deal with it all by myself as my dh is out on the road for weeks at a. Time.
Thanks & Love,
Kim
It wasn't his. A friend of his brought it to school and asked him to hold his back pack for him in his locker. My son agreed to do it. He admits he had a good idea what was in it but didn't know for sure. Someone tipped the principle off that my son's friend and my son were selling MJ......my son just by association to his friend and constant sidekick.
Now since my son is the one that got caught with it he will bear the brunt of the punishment.
He has been suspended automatically for one calendar year. I am hopping they will let him go to alternative school in 90 days ( I have to appeal this) meanwhile I will have to drive him from my town to the next town over every day and pick him up every day. It's a 30 min. Drive each way.
But that's not the worst of it. He was already on probation for hitting a kid that had been bullying him. This of course violates the probation. So, he has to go to court and I am scared to death they will send him to Juvenile detention. I can't stand the thoughts of it and it has me very upset.
I know he has to be disciplined. I know he was in the wrong for holding this stuff for his friend. And he admits that he has helped his friend sell it in the past. He does not smoke it himself. The officer himself told me that sometimes it helps kids who go to Juvenile detention but most of the time it doesn't.
Here is the thing that is breaking my heart.....he didn't help his friend for the money...to be mean, he wasn't doing it for any rebellious reason......he was doing it to have a friend. He says it s the only way kids like him is if he has something they want or do something for them. He wants friends so bad. Of course I told him that he was better off not having any friends at all than to have friends like this but you just can't tell a teen this and make him understand it. His question to me on the way home was: " why is it dad and my brother can make friends so easy and I can't"
S o he did all this just to have a friend. Yes its still wrong but as his mother I am heartbroken that he felt this was his only way to have friends.
And as a mother....the thoughts of my son being in juvenile 'jail' is killing me emotionally! I have been crying and crying over it and I am pretty sure this is what is going to happen. I am literally sick to my stomach. He is a good kid making some bad emotional choices. He is not rebellious and does not get in any other trouble with destructive kids set out to cause trouble. He did this to have friends:( And as my brother said to me ....my son is easy pray for people who are looking for someone who wants to fit in and belong to a group of friends.
Needless to say he was told his friendship with this other kid was 110% over and he would not be getting his drivers license because I did not trust him now.
So if I'm kind of scarce and/ or not very attentive, please forgive me. I'm going to be an emotional wreck for a few weeks. I have to get ahold of the school board and set up a hearing with them ASAP. And his court date is April 3 rd which is a very long time to worry!!
I could use some prayer.....God's will be done in this. And for my own mental stability. I'm having anxiety attacks and the depression is severe. I've had one breakdown a few years ago.....I can't have another one and I am a wreck right now.
Please be patient with me if I seem out of sorts, forgetful or I attentive....I love all of you and care very much about each one of you....I just have a lot of distractions going on right now and I'm having to deal with it all by myself as my dh is out on the road for weeks at a. Time.
Thanks & Love,
Kim
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88FIn 1969 we decided to get married without a big wedding. Most of our friends and family liked large over the top for the time kind of weddings and I did not. First, I didn't see why spending so much money for one day when we have the rest of our lives to live. I have never regretted not having a big formal wedding. Another issue is not liking all the attention. Also, we have gone to big...
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It's going to get hotter here with Thursday being the hottest. It's noon and 75f feels more like 80 or more.I've been cleaning up the deck in this morning and cleaning the windows outside. Then I cut up a pallet in half, I've decided to call it quits now because I went a bit light headed. Joanne, some drugs we take have an effect on us in the heat, I know a couple of mine do, maybe yours...
Boys that age have so much going on and are easy bait, wanting to fit in etc.
I just ache knowing you are alone a lot with your boys and the burden falls on you.
Be strong and know i am and others are here.
Someday i'll tell you my story, but now i still, don't like to talk about it.
Son is fine now but boy for a bit I was not right with the world.
loving hugs and I'm here
xooxoxoxox
All my love,
Tonna
troubles. It is heartbreaking when our children go
through these things.
You are in my prayers. I wish you didn't have to wait
so long for April.
love and prayers
Heather
I would not even trade in my age for having a teen again. Peer pressure is so common and trying to fit in just makes it worse. Unfortunately, as they say........."Bird's of a feather, flock together". And the cop's group them together without knowing any back story.
I know you must be going through hell with worry. We are all here for you!!
love you dearly.
Can your husband take some time off work to support you?
One wrong decision just be liked, i imagine your son is feeling pretty used and stupid right now. That is one hard lesson to learn.
Of course he has to know he done wrong and pay the consequences of his actions, but at the same time i feel its our job as parents to support our kids through their wrongs.
I'd be mad as hell with him but let him know i loved him.
He's young, only 15 and altho this is one huge bad choice, i pray that this is a "wake up" call and he makes better choices.
Please lay off the pressure on yourself, it wont hurt for him to see what this is doing to you, its all part of him growing up and seeing how our actions affect those we love.
Its bad, but not the end of the world, i hope you understand what i mean.
Hugs and prayers, lots of them.
Just concentrate on you and your family : )
I do 't know if I will have an opportunity to say anything in court or not. I hope so as I think they should take in consideration that the drugs were not my sons.
Guess we will see:(
Thanks again everyone!
Then she got in trouble again for truency and they threatened to have me arrested if she missed any more school. I was terrified. I had to work back then and I was the property manager at an apartment complex. If I lost my job we would've been homeless. My daughter didn't care she just wanted to do whatever she wanted. No consequences. I had to fight with her everyday to wake her up and get her off to school. I just about had a nervous breakdown. I'm here for you if you'd like to talk. I'll be praying for you and your son.
I'll send you my phone number via pm in case you want or need to talk. This is going to be a stressful time for a while. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this right now.
Hugs & prayers,
Marci
Giant hugs...