Stillbirth Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.

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Stuck in the 'depression' phase

Motek18
Motek18
How do I get past the depression stage of grief? I feel like everyone else has gone on with their life and I haven't. I haven't been able to accept that my daughter is gone and won't be coming back. It seems like as the days go by I get more and more upset and angry. I hate feeling like this. I used to be so happy. Now I feel dead inside.
terranickole
terranickole
I know exactly how you feel, its been 9.5 months and my depression and anger just gets worse and worse. Idk what will help counseling didn't help me.
deleted_user
deleted_user
how long has it been? For me I was able to go back to functioning normally after about a month but I felt the depression for probably 9 or 10 months. I can truly say I am feeling better now (at least not depressed and filled with anxiety) and it's been almost 1 year. Time is the only thing I think we have that will help in healing. God bless you.
Motek18
Motek18
It's been 2 1/2 months. I don't want to get on any medication because we are trying again. I don't want to be on anything that could cause harm to a new baby.
nasnye
nasnye
I was pretty bad until Annaya's first birthday. You must allow yourself to grieve. Don't rush grief, it's something you must go through.

This site helped me tremendously. Journal, journal, journal... it's important to get the feelings out.

Make a loss mom buddy... someone you feel comfortable talking to. This is a person you can talk and cry with via phone, email, fb etc...

Therapy does help BUT you must find the right therapist. I have been seeing my therapist for almost a year now and she is wonderful! She allows me to talk about my loss without judgement and she validates my feelings. She has never told me to "Get over" my feelings or to "move on".

If you are on FB there are wonderful supports there. Lori Spray-Esteve runs SOBBS and her FB group is wonderful for new losses. She was one of my great supports when I came here shortly after losing my daughter.

We've all been where you are. Ask any of the older DS sisters or simply read my old journals and you will see that I was in bad shape when I first started here. Now, I am a warrior. I am learning to coexist with my angel.

I spend more time on FB than here these days but I do make time to return to meet the new loss moms and their angels.

I'm sorry we've had to meet this way. But, I am happy that our angels have brought us together. Give yourself time to heal. It took time to make and carry a baby... it will take time to make it through grief. Remember, grief does not play fair and its stages does not occur in any particular order. Just because you experience on thing this month doesn't mean it won't return in December or later.

I was in tears yesterday because I wanted my 2 year old. My 12 year old was at a debate tournament, my 7 year old did not need me and I wanted Annaya, who would be my toddler now. I've already gone through EVERY stage of grief and the feeling of not being needed brought the longing back.

Anyway, I'm only a message away!

Hugs, Love & Rainbows to you!
Nneka