I just lost my second baby 2 days ago after just losing the first one last May. They both passed away after 19 weeks. I was told my first loss had a hypercoiled umbilical cord and was a fluke and would not happen again. We had no tests done on the baby or placenta or on me. Well another "fluke" happened exactly the same way at exactly the same time again. The cord was hypercoiled again but this time the placenta had an odd appearance to it as well the doctor said. She ran a whole panal of tests on me, the placenta and took a biopsy from the baby's leg. Hopefullly this time we will get some answers. I dont know if my husband will want to try again, he was not so sure this last time but I assured him it would be fine. Well, it was not. If they is a clear cut answer with an easy solution then who knows what the future holds. Right now I feel very numb and disconnected from the baby, it may be the medicine Im on. I am taking xanax to help but it is making me feel like nothing has happened. I am so afraid of feeling as bad as I did last May with the other loss but I know I have to deal with the greif. Maybe after the burial this week I will taper off and let the flood gates open. I am just so afraid though. I do have 2 other young children besides the 2 that we just recently lost. I am afraid to show my sadness around them because last time they were frightened to see me cry and be sad. Has anyone else lost 2 babies in a row? I am so anxious to see what the lab work comes back as, I want something to be wrong so that we know and so we can try to prevent this from happening a third time if we try again. I am going to be 36 in March so I do not have much time left but I know my body needs time to heal. In the last 8 months my body has made it half way through 2 pregnancies and Im sure it needs a break. I hate to think I may have to wait so long to try again if my husband wants to. After losing the first baby the only thing that kept me going was the thought of another pregnancy. This time if we decide not to try again I dont know how I will get through it. I love my other 2 children with all my heart but the thought of not getting pregnant again or finally holding another live baby just breaks my heart. I know I should be thankful for the 2 I have but the empty arms feeling is almost unbearable and that it could happen twice within such a short amount of time just makes it worse. Anyways, Im just rambling on here just kinda venting and I didnt really have a point to my post so forgive me. I just needed to talk I guess, thanks for listening

Wendy