Stillbirth Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.
I lost Evelyn on October 15, 2014 at 24 weeks. Since then, I had a missed miscarriage, my husband left me then we decided to work things out, I got through my Angel's one year anniversary, had another missed miscarriage, wanted to try again soon because I'm 42 and I'm racing against time, thought we were going to try again soon but now the other half wants to wait for the New Year. I get men and women grieve different, however I'm ready and every month that goes by is another valuable egg wasted. I feel myself getting more and more depressed. I have been crying more especially when I see or hear of others pregnant or just had their babies. It kills me silently inside. I want to scream but all I can do is cry. I hate this last year. I hate that I had to lose my precious Evelyn. I hate having to wait. I hate the way my life is going. I can't take it anymore!!!!
Celian
Do just that, find a safe place, a secluded part of the park, drive down an empty stretch of road, whatever..and just scream!! Let it out. I am crazy so not a good role model, but I have found collecting a bag of stones and going by the lake and throwing them in angrily, while throwing in a few swear/curse words, helps me burn off some stress. I really pray things turn a corner for us. Sending sticky baby dust your way!
Hollywood8687
I understand your feelings and feel so simalar every day. I have a lot of fear and anxiety something will go wrong or bad. I just really am having a rough time especially now. With my situation it was very different from a lot of people on here due to the fact I've had recurrent miscarriages and two being second trimester losses the twins at 22 weeks. It was very abrupt loss but it continues to play out in my mind every day involuntarily. They didn't even act like they want me to hold them after I lost them. I feel so deeply for so many others who were even further into it. But it doesn't matter how far it was and people always say things hinting that I should be over them already and the at leasts. I wouldn't want an at least to happen either but I certainly didn't want my babies to die either. I'm just upset with the depressing holidays coming up and sad. I know where you are coming from on wanting another baby as soon as possible. I wish some things wouldn't turn out so terrible like this. I'm sad for my losses and feel so much sorrow for everyone else's losses as well. I hope you have your rainbow soon. This hurts so much.
princessevelyn
Thank you ladies. Celian, you are not crazy. You have found great ways to cope and I think I'm going to take your advice. I need to take this anger, depression, sadness, and so much more out of my system. I do need to scream, shout, yell, curse, throw things, punch things, etc. I have been holding so much inside and I just want to explode! I hope, wish, and pray this new year is brighter, and fresher, and calmer, and more tranquil for all of us. Take care ladies.
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