Stillbirth Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.

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Antoi 07/07/2014

Our little angel Ben was born on the 6th of may 2014 he was our first baby we had being in to the maternity the previous week as I had just felt that there was something really wrong I had gotten no movement on this day so I was really nervous my pulse was racing while we waited for the doctor to come along and then we were told the devestating news that they could not find a heartbeat it was out worst fear and nightmare the whole week just went so slow and it was so hard to look at my bump i was 34 weeks Ben was born the following Tuesday on the 6th he was just so beautiful and perfect and even tough we new the outcome going into the labor was some part of me was still hoping that they were wrong and that he was going to be fine, these past few weeks have being so hard to cope and i think about him all the time and miss him terribly i have great support from my family but my sister in law who im very close to is expecting her baby in two weeks time and im feeling as its getting nearer to her due date im feeling very anxious and don't know how im going to feel when the baby arrives its just so hard.

Celian 07/10/2014

My sister that nursed me when my daughter was born was 39 weeks pregnant with her third child, and second daughter. She delivered 10 days after Sinza was born and I took care of her and her baby in hospital. It is so excruciatingly tough to watch other have healthy babies while our sweet angels didn't make it home. I wont lie to you that things are going to be tough, but you will get through it the same way you got through Ben's birth, funeral, putting away his clothes..we don't get to have a choice, we trudge on in life, with our tattered hearts, in the best way we can. I pray for your strength and comfort.

Celian 07/10/2014

that was supposed to be ..i wont lie to you that things are not going to be tough...but you will get through it

Antoi 07/10/2014

Thanks Celine it is very tough, she is going in next Tuesday to have her baby and I am feeling very emotional today she is a really great person and she too was there trough it all for me when Ben was born as she is a midwife herself I dont think I would have as strong trough it all only for her im blessed to have her as my sister in law this is her third baby.

Marthar1201 07/10/2014

My neighbor had her baby the same week I had my stillborn baby boy Eli.... and ny heart aches every time I see her pulling in the driveway and carrying her baby in the car seat. Its painful..... it's hard to feel joy when u see others babies when you feel empitness in your heart because u dont have your own baby anymore..... I do hear people say it gets better..... How? How does it get better?..... Antoi I am keeping u in my praters stay strong cry if you have to..... dont hold your feelings...... wish I coukd give you a hug.... I know how you feel :0(

Antoi 07/11/2014

Thanks Martha,

I cried for most of the day yesterday and to my husband last night and I feel a little bit better today, this new baby also affects him and I was so taken up with my own emotions that I didnt realize how much he was hurting aswell as he is such a strong person and was my rock trough it all.

He went back to work a week after Bens funeral where is I haven't gone back yet im not going to go back until the end of Sept, as I work in a department store and I just can't face people or their questions at the moment and its not even the questions if someome says sorry for your loss i just burst out crying its just so hard, and two of my friends at work are pregnant aswell one girl is due this month and the other girl in September we were all meant to have our babies together its just mot fair, I actually feel anxious even thinking about going back but hopefully I will be that little bit stronger by the end of September.

I just prayed to god last night to ask him why, why us its just not fair, life is really cruel sometimes.

sasha2010 07/11/2014

Gosh, I am visiting this site after a long time, and I even came here the first time to help moms who had been through what I had been through. Nothing is going to feel right. I lost my little baby the weekend before my baby shower. Still born and beyond devastation for me. Hang in there. Cry weep scream and lean on others. My sister in law had her son a few weeks after my due date. It was beyond beyond beyond difficult. I have a beautiful 10 year old daughter now..and thank God every day for the gift of her. Breathe, grieve, and lean on people. I remember nobody knew what to say. They scuttle around and aren't certain how to deal with you. It's okay..cry and let them know you want them to acknowledge your loss. I spent a month in pajamas not certain what to do with myself. Hang in there and lean on those of us that have been there before. One step at a time. That's my unofficial and unprofessional advice, but comes from someone who has been there..BIG hugs headed your way. Hug yourself and cry. I am so sorry for your loss.

sasha2010 07/11/2014

Oh, AND IT IS NOT FAIR. I lost my little baby Taylor on December 1, 2002. Interestingly enough I found I was pregnant the following mother's day without realizing it was even mother's day. Hang in there. Don't face people at work if you don't want to, but in my experience they don't know what to say. I used to break into tears and rush away. Do that if you have to. Hugs, hugs, and hugs again.

Antoi 07/12/2014

Thanks Sasha,

It feels really good to be talking to so many people that are going trough the pain that I feel, its really hard tough some days im good and then I have very bad ones.
next month we are going to ttc again so hopefully it will happen as fast this time as it was the last time as I have told others I am ready physically but emotionally im still bad but I dont think it will matter emotionally if we wait for 2 years as what we all have being trough its going to b emotional anyway the next time.

Antoi 07/18/2014

Hi my friends,

So I woke this morning to news that I have beautiful new nephew so im emotional but delighted for them at the sametime im a bit envious of all their excitment and people ringing them to congratulate them.

Hopefully I will have that same excitment in the future and my little angel will help me to go trough it. Xx

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