spouse came out as crossdresser but really a femme fatale wannabe.  Happened after 21 yrs of marriage.  Stayed in marriage because my life savings now in trust.

i have been leading a really lonely life right beside my spouse.  My life is challenging and rewarding but lonely.  My «he is really a she” is not the icebreaker you might envision: more like an ice maker.

so I have pursued all of my own interests and activities and plan my life the way I want without thought about the baggage.

sorry to sound so cold but the coming out after 20 years of being the family omnipresent magician in all things needed/wanted/required for 3 daughters and a negligent spouse something snapped.

i didn’t deserve him and he sure as h—- did not deserve me.  So I care about my spouse about a dozen notches from where I started.

i do have a therapist and friends and family to whom I can turn but the issue Remains in MY closet.  I did remove my wedding band and plan to continue to co exist with this stranger.

on a  cold or rainy sleepless night I can still feel the loss of what could and should have been had all the lies not taken place.  I still yearn for a soul mate and lover with whom I can grow old.  Just not in my cards.