So, I am finally able to breathe. I have spoken with my spouse and tried to just list what I am ok with and express where I am at. Basically, I told him I married a man, I see him as a man, and that's it. Period. I am not calling him by another name because I do not see him as anyone but who I married. I told him I was ok with his dressing at home, I was ok with his dressing androgenously around town, BUT I was going out to plays and on dates with my husband. PERIOD. That's it. He said that at this time he is happy and feeling like his outside reflects his inside. So for now, I am going to stop thinking about it, I am going to stop fretting, BUT I am not going to stop planning or preparing for life without him. I do not know how long his "authentic" self is going to be insync. I am going to continue planning for my future, I am going to curtail my spending, continue trying diligently to save and to squirrel away all that I can. I am going to make sure all my bills are paid and I have limited to no outstanding debt. If we stay together, wonderful we'll start retirement with more. If not, at least I will be a bit more financially prepared. That will relieve some stress.
I have to admit, it is a relief to finally have a decision made one way or another. I will be going to a therapist, but just knowing what I can and can't deal with and being able to be honest and frank about it really helps us both. If he gets to the point where he needs to go further, then we can revisit things, but at least I am standing up for myself and I can verbalize what I can and can not handle. What a relief.
I feel like a backpack of bolders has been lifted off my shoulders and back. It's quite freeing.
I am just wondering if any of you have changed the love you have for your spouse. The romantic love I had for my spouse has changed to more of a love you have for a friend. We seem to be just friends, travel companions and roommates any more. It could be that we're older and have been together for so long. I loved the male of him, but in order to accept or respect the female in him, I...
Hi folks, I haven't posted much lately - although I have been reading - mainly because I really haven't had much to say or add. The way things are at the moment - well, they are as they were. Nothing has changed. Nothing has moved on. I'm not sure if this is because my partner has gone as far as he needs to - which isn't very far really, just a bit of female clothing, a bit of make up, body...