Spouses of Transgender Community Group
Being transgender it's not easy but neither for their spouses. This group is created with the intention of helping and getting to know others that are in. the same situation or to just educate those that are on the other side of the fence and want to know how does it feel or how would it feel to be a spouse of a transgender person. The main objective of this group is...
I'm so angry right now. It's like he even forgot what we had and he isnt being her. It makes me so angry I want to go out to where he stays now and tear to shreads everything that is hers. She repulses me. She brings out the very worst of me and I cant always control it. It's an uncontrollable rage. I love him so much and he keeps saying he doesnt want to do it anymore. But, I dont see any effort in trying to change. I think it's time we go out separate ways.
Initially I changed pronouns because it was helping with her dysphoria, and she was so happy about my doing so. However, I wonder if it helped me too. Her personality changed drastically and the pronoun change has sort of made me feel like there are two people here:
the husband I had- He wasn't perfect, but he loved me and could work with me, and I with him.
the wife I have- She is cold, selfish, has a convoluted conversational style, gaslights me, tries to manipulate me.
Maybe thinking of them as two different people has helped me grieve?
I still cry regularly. Some of my husband's bad traits are still present in my wife as well. The pain still consumes me.
But I'm not as angry at the husband. He was nice when I had him around. Before today, I was grateful to have had what time I did have with him.
Today was a tough day.