I don't know the exact date, as in my case it happened in stages - first stage was me finding the underwear, second stage (many months later) was me confronting him about it. Then another few months of head in the sand, then finally, I don't remember the exact date but it was early September, the 'big talk' where hormones and transition were first mentioned.
Maybe the best private way to acknowledge it, is to have a rant on here? We will all be here for you.
Good luck xx

You mean a different rant than the ones I have the rest of the year... lol!

I found the account on June 14th but did not suspect crossdressing. The confrontation and big talk were June 19th after I confirmed it was his account and he had made the purchases. Within a week it was clarified that he was transgender (binary) and not simply a crossdresser. (I have that date available as I wrote about it, but not memorized like June 19th.)

Can't believe it's almost a year. Back then I didn't expect to last this long. I also wouldn't have guessed so much and yet so little would change.

Different dates have different meanings for us all. I can tell you the exact date that an anonymous person messaged me on Facebook with a screenshot of my husband’s female profile and a photo of her with her bestfriend. That was the day I learned her name and that my husband had been on HRT.
As they say, a day that will live in infamy.

I remember the day I found out vividly. It has been 8 yesrs since I learned and I still cross out March 26th on my calendar every year. He still doesn't know why I do it or what the day signifies. It was the worst day of my life and I don't want to remember it. I wish we could just skip that day.

May 15th will always hold this meaning for me. Acknowledge with us. We are here for you.

I remember - September 29. I started writing a journal about it all, and I see the date he sent me the message every time I open the document. I feel some dread about the date too, but I can only hope that by then there will be more positives to look back on than negatives.

I suppose it isn't entirely related, but I struggled a lot when my son was under a year, especially the newborn period. I didn't cherish it like you're supposed to. But when I look back on it now, I remember that I survived and I'm still here in one piece. It was a really hard time for me, but I survived and made it through the tough parts.

Perhaps thinking of survival rather than loss may make a difference because you don't have to pretend things are or were great, just that you're still here and pushing through.

YS, I love it. I think you're right. When I have my wits about me, I remember to feel strong - like a survivor. Thanks for the reminder.

July 11th, when I found the the choice was made to go forward without including me in that decision. Felt like I didn't matter, had no value and was an insignificant partner of this marriage. Yep, it sucked.