I'm realy happy for you!! Well hopefully you 2 will learn how to b good parents together for the baby. Yes he is bein a bit mean about it, he's prob scared. I hope that he'll be nice to you through the rest of this. HUGS

congrats on the baby. I hope that everything works out for you.

your ex sounds like my ex, a complete and utter asshole. I dont know much about your situation, but my ex hasnt seen my son in 2 months b/c he hates having supervised visits in my house so he chose not to come. he already volunteered to pay me support but has now backed out of his word bc according to him im not allowing access when the dumbass never calls to arrange visits. i keep details notes of everything to cover my own ass.

custody is always given to mom unless for some reason mom is not capable of taking care of the child. you can vent to me at any time.

Thank you. You know I already went down this road with my 13 year olds father. The sad thing is I been single for so long because I would date just anyone I didnt want to make the same mistakes. The funny thing is my unborn baby father is the one man I trusted. We dated when we was younger from 13/14 until 16/17 years old and then we broke up when he went to college and we both lived our lives separately. 20 years later we reconnected on facebook and everything was wonderful but out the blue one day he just stop communicating and never gave me a reason. Then I found out I was pregnant and he became evil and turned into this person I didnt know. He really hurt me because he was the one man on this earth I trusted and here I am again in a very similar situation as before pregnant and alone.

I came about what you wrote about how the father of your unborn baby is going to fight you for custody because he doesn't want to pay child support. I would just say to him "fine see you in court". Any letters, e-mail, texts you get from him in regards to the baby I would print off and make copies starting now as to they will help you in court. Also, if you don't have the money to hire a lawyer than Legal Aid will help you (at least I knwo they do from where I am from). Please don't let the father of your un-born child intimidate you or try to scare you. You got your signs that you were sopose to keep this baby. I am not going to say it is going to be easy raising a child on your own because it's not. But I promise you when you see your child for the first time and hold him/her it will be all worth it. There are so many organizations out there to help and support single mom's.

Thank you so much for your support. Im not even worried about him getting custody Im just hurt. Im 38 years old, I own a home and been working for a wonderful supportive company for 6 years. Im drug free, have a clean record and never even had a spending ticket. I go to church on Sundays and visit my parents for dinner every week. Ive been volunteering in my community for over 15 years working with Pop Warner and other youth programs. I know and could get many recommendations from politicians, athletes, Anchor people, lawyers, doctors, friends, employer etc. He on the other hand is single, has no friends, works 60 hours per week and doesnt even call his mother to see how shes doing. He doesnt have the experience or the support system to raise a child alone and he doesnt even know how to communicate. The sad thing is because he isnt married, has no children and works 60 hours a week by law if he keeps acting evil he will have to pay me about $1,600.00 a month in support which is why I dont understand why he wont just work with me as a friend and parent. He just makes me sick I wish he would grow up.

Oh get used to the money not coming in and him being an asshole part! For sure! It's completely your decision to keep the baby. They are wonderful. But as a young mom, myself, I hope you have a strong support group. You're definitely going to need one. Good luck! When is your due date?

Thank you so much. Im due on Christmas day 12/25/09

I have a good group of supportive friends, neighbors, and my family that will be there even the asshole mom would be there if need be.

Thanks so much for your support!

I am so happy for you, this new little life will be so special and so worth it! I know what a struggle this was for you as it is my situation to a "T"! I too was freinds with my ex first and had not dated in over 7 years until he came along... charming at first but after the unexpected pregnancy bomb turned into someone that I would prefer to never know!

I too am older, 34, own my home, stable 10+ career, finacially stable etc...

My ex was verbally and emotionally abusive my ENTIRE pregnancy... We finally could only communicate via a mediator.

I spent hundreds of $$$ on lawyers and mediators as he too was fighting for full custody in order to avoid child support.

After many many court dates, mediator dates etc I realized this was never going to end... court ordered support or not he was always going to be a pain in the ass and make things hard for me in someway or another...

I decided right then and there that I did not want to subject my son to that and offered him the get out of jail free card.

I did not think he would take it as he was fighting so hard for custody, but when I offered to let him off the hook and not seek support payments he could not sign on the dotted line fast enough

This just further solidified my concerns that the only reason he wanted custody was to avoid paying support... fine... if money is more important to him then the well being of my son I did not want him involved.

This is not the answer for everyone, just wanted to share my thoughts on it...

For me I would rather struggle financially then subject myself or my son to someone who only cares about money... food for thought.

Good luck on everything and I wish you a healthy and happy pregnancy!

I am glad that you have decided to keep your baby. I am faced with a similar situation. I have a big fight with my bf about a week and a half ago. Things have not been right since. I know that he has been cheating on me. I truly loved this man. I am 36 years old. I am 12 weeks pregnant. I am due on Dec 13, 2009. I had an abortion appointment this morning at 8am. The father of this child was supposed to bring me some money last night--he called at 2am. He did not show. I was all set to go and this morning I felt terrible. I just could not go through with it. I feel a since of peace now bc I have FINALLY made a decision to continue the pregnancy. What bothers me is that WE decided that I get off of the pill. I felt I was getting older, since I am going to be 37 in Dec, and this would be a good time. I got pregnant and the rest is history. I did NOT want to raise another child alone so when we split I seriously considered abortion. Now, I am up for the challenge!! I hope to find support while I am going through this pregnancy. After he left, many family members, except for a couple, told me that abortion probably would be best. I will you the best. I think it will be different this time since we are older moms and we have been down this road before. Keep me in your prayers, and I will do the same.

congratulations on your decision! I feel your pain with your current situation.

I have a 14 year old son that I have raised alone. The father didn\'t want me to have him (he insisted on me having an abortion) so basically...I didn\'t go after child support, and raised my son myself. I have a 4 year old daughter who\'s father keeps threatening to try to get custody of her, but has never paid me a dime of support. I have to make sacrifices of things I want, but I have the joy of having two wonderful kids that are my life! It won\'t always be easy, but once you have that baby in your life...you won\'t be able to imagine life without him/her! Good luck...stay strong!!

keep records of all of this. the appointments. the transferred money. keep a detailed journal of every idiotic thing he says. through experience i learned to do this.....that way....you can come up with a date and remember exactly what it was that was said.

i do hope everything works out for you *HUGS* i'm sorry he's such a jerk. :(