Shyness Support Group
Shyness is a feeling of insecurity that certain people experience while being among others, talking with others, asking favors of others, etc. The initial cause of shyness can vary. Scientists have located some genetic data that supports the hypothesis that shyness is at least partially genetic.
I just read these two books (Living with a Hidden Disability and Getting Help) and came across some words that I thought might be helpful.
Avoid -should- because second guessing ruins your self-esteem. An overactive and terrorizing inner critic is dangerous. They can distort your self-image and makes you feel weak and inadequate.
It is okay to be assertive about your needs and rights. You have the right to put yourself first and to express yourself.
It is okay to say no, and to set limits.
Do not apologize for asserting your needs, you do not have to demean yourself for others. Stand up straight, make eye contact, take your time, breath, and relax.
Be a broken record when your needs are not being met. Do not break down because others get uneasy. When discussing stay focused on what you need.
Be optimistic - this will get better-I can do this-
Use the trees "d"s:
-Disagree with your negitive voice
-Distance yourself from pessimistic thoughts
-Develop positive ways of thinking and looking at yourself
Don't shy away when someone doesn't understand. Instead try to educate them on whats going on.
Be resilient; resiliency is the inner strength to recover from setbacks and disappointments.
Take control of the situation instead of letting others make your choices for you.
Let yourself grieve, its okay to express your emotions.
Don't think in ways of being a victim, get informed and fight back.
Accept: Yes I have this but it does not define me.
Be pratical; You will survive this and come out strong but know this wont happen over night. Be flexable to change.
Remeber you have faced hardship before, you have come out of it. Maybe a little battered and scarred but alive. You can do this.
You should be proud of what you've survived, scars and all.
You are greater than the sun of physical and emotional limitations.
Forgive yourself
-I forgive myself for making mistakes
-I am only human
-I am letting go of anger and hurt
-I forgive myself
Forgiving Others
-I forgive you for causeing me pain
-I forgive you for making mistakes
-You hurt me but I understand that you are only human
-I forgive you
Asking for forgiveness
-I didn't mean to hurt and anger you
-I am only human and make mistakes
-I am sorry for hurting you
-Please forgive me
Things to say to yourself:
-I am worthwhile person
-I love myself
-I am lovable
-I am capable
-I can say no when I need too
-I deserve to be happy
-I deserve to be treated well
-I feel good about my accomplishments
-I feel good about myself
-I admire myself for living with challenges
-I am doing the best I can
-I am not responsible for how other people react and think
-I believe I can do this
-I see flair-ups as challenges not crises
-I am a good person
Well thats what I wanted to share hope you like it. Best of luck my friends.
-Dee
Avoid -should- because second guessing ruins your self-esteem. An overactive and terrorizing inner critic is dangerous. They can distort your self-image and makes you feel weak and inadequate.
It is okay to be assertive about your needs and rights. You have the right to put yourself first and to express yourself.
It is okay to say no, and to set limits.
Do not apologize for asserting your needs, you do not have to demean yourself for others. Stand up straight, make eye contact, take your time, breath, and relax.
Be a broken record when your needs are not being met. Do not break down because others get uneasy. When discussing stay focused on what you need.
Be optimistic - this will get better-I can do this-
Use the trees "d"s:
-Disagree with your negitive voice
-Distance yourself from pessimistic thoughts
-Develop positive ways of thinking and looking at yourself
Don't shy away when someone doesn't understand. Instead try to educate them on whats going on.
Be resilient; resiliency is the inner strength to recover from setbacks and disappointments.
Take control of the situation instead of letting others make your choices for you.
Let yourself grieve, its okay to express your emotions.
Don't think in ways of being a victim, get informed and fight back.
Accept: Yes I have this but it does not define me.
Be pratical; You will survive this and come out strong but know this wont happen over night. Be flexable to change.
Remeber you have faced hardship before, you have come out of it. Maybe a little battered and scarred but alive. You can do this.
You should be proud of what you've survived, scars and all.
You are greater than the sun of physical and emotional limitations.
Forgive yourself
-I forgive myself for making mistakes
-I am only human
-I am letting go of anger and hurt
-I forgive myself
Forgiving Others
-I forgive you for causeing me pain
-I forgive you for making mistakes
-You hurt me but I understand that you are only human
-I forgive you
Asking for forgiveness
-I didn't mean to hurt and anger you
-I am only human and make mistakes
-I am sorry for hurting you
-Please forgive me
Things to say to yourself:
-I am worthwhile person
-I love myself
-I am lovable
-I am capable
-I can say no when I need too
-I deserve to be happy
-I deserve to be treated well
-I feel good about my accomplishments
-I feel good about myself
-I admire myself for living with challenges
-I am doing the best I can
-I am not responsible for how other people react and think
-I believe I can do this
-I see flair-ups as challenges not crises
-I am a good person
Well thats what I wanted to share hope you like it. Best of luck my friends.
-Dee
this is a great post! why can't i think like this by default?! if only :)
i'm going to practice, practice, practice.
thank you for sharing this.