Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
When I was eight an uncle molested me. Even though he was someone I knew I have had problem ever since then with strangers touching me.
When I was pregnant people were always wanting to touch my belly and I would have to hold my breath and bite my lips. Sometimes after I would go to the washroom and cry. I hate hugging people I don't know well, I have when people touch my arm in conversation. It takes all I've got not to cringe and pull away.
But my fiancee got me a massage certificate for last mother's day. I have yet to use it because I'm terrified at the thought of a stranger touching me, in so many places! It's a female massues, he made sure as he know's my past. And I promised him I would try when I got it.
But now I just can't bring myself to do it! He's hurt that I haven't gone, as he put alot of thought into my first ever mother's day gift. And he was sensitive enough to make sure it was a female and that she was good. He actually took a poll amongst everyone he knows to see who got the highest reccomendations and who was the best at putting people at ease.
I need to do it. Just as much for me as for him. But I am so damn scared. I feel like a baby.
When I was pregnant people were always wanting to touch my belly and I would have to hold my breath and bite my lips. Sometimes after I would go to the washroom and cry. I hate hugging people I don't know well, I have when people touch my arm in conversation. It takes all I've got not to cringe and pull away.
But my fiancee got me a massage certificate for last mother's day. I have yet to use it because I'm terrified at the thought of a stranger touching me, in so many places! It's a female massues, he made sure as he know's my past. And I promised him I would try when I got it.
But now I just can't bring myself to do it! He's hurt that I haven't gone, as he put alot of thought into my first ever mother's day gift. And he was sensitive enough to make sure it was a female and that she was good. He actually took a poll amongst everyone he knows to see who got the highest reccomendations and who was the best at putting people at ease.
I need to do it. Just as much for me as for him. But I am so damn scared. I feel like a baby.
Even with my mate, I'm allergic if he's stroking my hair because that -bleep- did that many many times to me. The same goes for hugging me too tight or pressing his face against mine.
We talked through these things and he stopped doing these, sweet angel :)
He's also a natural born, talented masseur and it helps a LOT! But I can't imagine going to a male masseur other than him - okay, maybe if he's gay :P
Hugs:
Spiritguide
FIRST, the massage technician NEEDS to know that you've been abused. No need to go into details with them, but the technician will be able to tell that you're sensitive to touch, so might as well get it out of the way right up front.
SECOND, a massage doesn't need to be "full body" where the technician might be touching you "in so many places". You can tell the technician to do specific areas - just shoulders, just below the knees, whatever. That establishes boundaries and you know what to expect