Hello & welcome
Call a local sexual assault center.
I volunteer at one
at the center there is free counseling with counselors that specialize in sexual assault whether it is historic (child abuse) or a new assault.
There are also some great groups that deal with child abuse.
The sexual assault center will know what is available in your area.
also there are crisis phone lines at most sexual assault centers most are 24/7 you can call if you are having flash backs or you are upset about it.

There are also spots like this one where you can reach out to others who have/are dealing with it we help each other.
also there are some great self help books like the courage to heal
hope this helps
K

As Kayce1970 stated, Calling and making an appointment with your nearest sexual abuse counselor is a first good step. Look for your local Counsel on Sexual Abuse.

This is a great site to talk to others and vent.

I went through some couseling for a year or so then my cousler just one day up and left and said she was opening her own practice and I can not afford her fees. That just through me for a loop and I never went back to counseling. I know I should go back but I dont know where to start.

anyone have any other ideas? How does everyone else deal with this kind of abuse? besidesgoing through counseling what else do you do to deal with the abuse? please share if you like.

You can write your abuser a letter and let him know how you feel then burn the letter. I would also start a journal and write down your feelings sometimes when we see things in black and white we have a new outlook on how our abuser is still controling us.
much love
Elizabeth

In my deprssion support group today we were talking about relationship and familys ext and I said something about my past abuse. I was abused by a family member and oneother group member said to me if I had the chance to beat him up would you stop me I said no. I dont like to use the word "hate" but I hate this family member for what he did to me. Now the counsler looked at me funny and said you would really do that and say that I said yes. I am sorry I can not forgive this person for what he did. I know they say to fogive but I cant do that. He ruined my life, I am not going to fogive him for that,sorry.

forgiveness is for you, not him. You will never forgive the act. That is something that was totally wrong. Some never find it.

I have read many books, been in counseling for years and after years of torment I have found forgiveness for my brother, but never for what he did.

I am far enough into my journey that I am feeling better about myself. I do not feel 100% and probably never will. It takes a lot of hard work and a lot of retraining your brain to think a different.

I write a lot. I write poems and journal. I have wrote my brother many letters yelling at him.

I have a website that I write on, it is www.thebeautifulsurvivor.com if you want to check it out. there are books there that I highly recommend reading.

Good luck!

thank you Dawn I love your poams. I will look into getting those books they sounds good. I appreciate any support I can get right now.:)

Those that sexually abuse others do not have a clue as to the damage this physical act does to the inner emotions of the victim.

These acts affect the victims for a lifetime in many cases. Some victims can deal with it and go on to live productive, happy lives while others struggle with this for an entire lifetime.

Each case must be handled differently because not everyone is alike. Often times therapists overlook this.

My ex was a victim of incest by her first cousin. She was 14 and he was 28, married with 5 children. I dealt with this with her for many years. I am not a therapist by any means but, I have dealt with this on a first hand basis, for years.

Hi, I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I also volunteer at a local wmen's service center. I live in your state. If you call 1-800-R U ABUSED, it's jersey battered women's services, and ask for the # for the services center near your town or in your county. They have a huge book of #s of women's centers throughout the country. I hope this helps. Most people don't understand alot about what happened to you, the feelings involved, and how you struggle, and of those that do, many just don't want to take it on or get involved. You have to advocate for yourself, take a stand for you, and reach out for help. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, (((hugs)))

thanks oldbiker and bandmom. I know nobody really understands what you are going through sometimes. It is very painful and very hurtful and disturbing. I have been dealing with this for along time now. I did go through some couseling but I dont think it was enough or did the right thing for me. Maybe another counselr or something will help me deal with this. Bandmom what part of the state are you from if I may ask? you can pm me if you want to. I think this has a lot to do withmy depression and the way I am because of what I went through. I have been tramatized and victimized. I could write a book on this subject.