Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
I'm so sick of being home, I'm so mentally exhausted I don't want to go to school. I just don't want to be here in this town in this state. Im so tired of feeling nothing g but depression and sadness. I feel like a burden, I can't c talk to my mom anymore because all she does is yell at me. Why is it that no one wants to listen to me and try and see things from my way. If I left home I want pulpit have that battle, because I would finally be set for from the burden that I cause people.
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I feel so dirty and used I was drunk and passed out at a party when I came around some guy was on top of me rapeing me he covered my mouth and told me to shut up afterwards he got up and got dressed and said I better not tell anyone I found my friend and reported that I had been raped after having medical checks and them getting DNA I've taken the morning after pill IAM just so depressed and...
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Upon his departure, he remarked, "I am in many people’s pockets; no one will believe you." Have you ever grappled with the silence that follows sexual assault, where the perceived impossibility of being believed necessitates self-censorship?
This situation is not something you caused, so please don't let yourself be further hurt by it. Other people might want you to be quiet and push it under the rug, but that's not fair to you.
Have you tried talking to a counselor at your college? If not, please talk to someone as soon as possible.
I had to push my mother away for a while to keep myself safe. It was easier for me because I am married and have a home of my own. But I do believe in getting some distance from those who are not helping in the healing process. As DW mentioned a plan is essential if you want to move out so please do talk to a counselor at school or someone else you trust.
i read in your post on the ptsd board that you are going to counseling - good for you, thank goodness you are and trying to find the right fit, the right one for you. i know how hard it is to find someone we can be comfortable enough with.
i don't know what sorts of help victim services offer, but it is worth checking it out - especially as this crime has caused you so much/is causing you so much stress. perhaps there is more help than just counseling. maybe there is more they can do for you.
maybe you can finish your school work from a different location - take the stress off of you that way. sometimes things can be arranged, i think.
also, maybe the counselor can help you find ways to say things to your mother that will help you not need to talk about this with her until you feel prepared to do that.
and things to say to your sister to help her understand, or to help that relationship be less stressful.
lighten things up a bit at the house until you are ready/if you ever want to discuss this with them.
if you are 18, there may be options and help that you can find out about. they may not be options you choose to follow through on - but you can know about them. it is always good to know we have options/choices and what they are.
it is also smart to not make choices when we feel pressure. better to wait, rest, think. a good test is this: h.a.l.t. it stands for h=hungry a=angry l=lonely t=tired - so it is good to check in with yourself to see if you are hungry, angry, lonely or tired - and if you are any of those things, to take care of your needs before launching into a reaction response
i'm glad you are here with us. i'm sorry for what brought you here, so sorry, but you are here now and not alone with this. you've got us now. gentle hugs, lilly