YOU ARE NOT ALONE! I'm with you.I'm only 19, but I've had issues making friends since the abuse started (age 7?). I find it so very hard to trust people that I normally push people away. Part of that is depression, etc. I also suffer from the fact that when I do allow someone into my life (such as my best friend or my fiancee) I trust them completely, often times more than I trust myself (Okay, always more than I trust myself) which has lead me to be abused more.... and then I trust less, it's a vicious cycle.

I'm here if you ever need/want to talk.

Trust issues are a huge thing for people who were abused and/or violated. I have massive trust issues as well. You aren't alone.

I'm 19 now and I was abused between 3 and 6. Growing up I would jump or freak out ANY TIME someone touched me- whether it was a hug or someone walking past bumping into me... It was always hard for me to get close to people because of this. It isn't your fault- it just takes time and a lot of hard work and will to overcome this and make friends. Even if you only have a few close ones, I know you can do it. Good luck.

I have trouble seeming to make or keep friends because of my Depression. Lately my Depression has been getting worse because I am dealing with childhood sexual abuse for the first time. I find it hard to trust people too. I think people judge me because I have a mental illness. I think part of the judgement is that they don't understand and the other half is just arrogance. True friends will like you and be there for you no matter what. I have been dating my boyfriend. I had someone ask me if I honetly trust him 100%. I can only say that I trust him 95% because it's hard to trust completely because of what I've been through. He told me that he couldn't trust 100% either because he was cheated on by his last girlfriend. Trust is something I think needs to be earned. Once someone breaks my trust then I don't want them in my life anymore because trust is something special and important to have. That's just my take. But just know that you are not alone.

It makes me so mad the people are arrogant to judge because of mental illness!!!!

I am both sorry and glad for your situation star, sorry that you were abused and glad that we can have the opportunity to build some of that trust back that seems lost for ever.There are many aspects to life which cannot be fully explained by a shared experience but As adult survivors of abuse we assume that everything in this world is a product of that violated state we carry around in our heads. We the survivors are sensitive to pain ,pain which stems from abuse with a daily reminder of that pain on the tv news of all the victims who did not survive the defiling of innocence. Sometimes we feel like they were the lucky ones as thier ordeal is over.
We are left with little foundation upon which to build stable intimate relationships,lasting friendships or anything mutual that doesnt involve fear of being abused. even the hint of abandonment can set us offf on a negative spiral.While we are drawn to the suffering of others it can only provide temporary relief to know you are not alone as each of us is an island when it comes to abuse in childhood. We feel as we get older we have more in common with the abuser who we hate but are in someway still connected to in that they were the last person we trully trusted and even felt we consented to those confusing acts .At the real core of it all is the fact that we are the keepers of that secret and no matter how many times we let it out we cannot help feeling we have betrayed ouselves once again leaving us open to yet more abuse allbeit psychological.Being told by health proffesionals that our abuser was also the result of abuse opens even more deadly doors to the feeling that we are just part of a cycle and cannot ourselves be trusted to provide a healthy stable base for the next generation.
When we sit on a crowded train or a bus look around at fellow passengers. All strangers all with different experiences to you some may have destructive unhealthy thoughts but we sit very close in total confidence that those around us do not wish us any harm.There are obvious levels of trust which are taken for granted one is that our parents are our primary carers and if trust is breached at that level then how do we cope with all the rest of humanity?

Start from within star Ask can I relax around my own sexuality? Do I tense up when someone I like comes into my intimate soace?Am I comfortable looking at the places on my body the abusers hands have been? At the time of the abuse was I comfortable at any point or was I constantly aware of the harm it was causing. Find a comfort zone and then step outside of it. Pracice non-victim self talk. Create a new emotional language not based on guilt and shame.EgThere is a part of us all that enjoyed the attention of our abuser that trusted thier intention.Its that part we must use to create balance where thereis non. Much as we would like to see the bastard burn in hell its that emotion which creates anger at the world We see all men as abusers and manipulators and all children as victims.
Use the one thing the violator could never touch ie our imagination

You are coping star because for whatever is in you has given you a basic survival kit to communicate I hope we can add to that kit some more useful tools.True love x