Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
I'm new at this group. I actually never wanted to be part of it, even if I get what it feels, I was just avoiding my own feelings.
When I was 10, I was abused for the first time. It was by a friend's brother. Hurt like hell being so young, and not having anyone doing anything for me. Not even my family. I went through hell for a long time, I even tried killing myself, didn't work.
Three years ago, I was abused for the second time. It was by a teacher when I was in med school. He said horrible things to me that still are haunting me. He did horrible things that still hurt. But what hurt the most, was that even when I told everyone what had happened, no one believed me, and I couldn't get justice either.
A week ago, I got abused for the third time, by a stranger on a bus in he middle of the night while I was sleeping. And I feel so helpless, I losing all hope. I can't even see myself without hating me, I can't go out without feeling afraid, I'm anxious all the time. I can't sleep, 'cause nightmares invade my mind all night. I can't even be near my friends without shaking.
I just want it all to stop, I just want to forget.
Does it ever gets better?
When I was 10, I was abused for the first time. It was by a friend's brother. Hurt like hell being so young, and not having anyone doing anything for me. Not even my family. I went through hell for a long time, I even tried killing myself, didn't work.
Three years ago, I was abused for the second time. It was by a teacher when I was in med school. He said horrible things to me that still are haunting me. He did horrible things that still hurt. But what hurt the most, was that even when I told everyone what had happened, no one believed me, and I couldn't get justice either.
A week ago, I got abused for the third time, by a stranger on a bus in he middle of the night while I was sleeping. And I feel so helpless, I losing all hope. I can't even see myself without hating me, I can't go out without feeling afraid, I'm anxious all the time. I can't sleep, 'cause nightmares invade my mind all night. I can't even be near my friends without shaking.
I just want it all to stop, I just want to forget.
Does it ever gets better?
You have every right to be angry at the people who hurt you. But to spread that hatred to EVERYONE who is female, is a social worker or a therapist, is unfair. Just as it is unfair that they have lumped you into the category of "ALL males who were abused will become abusers themselves".
Do therapists have their own issues from their own past. Of course they do. I challenge you to find one person who doesn't have something in their past that has affected who they are and how they interact with the world around them. We all have a past. EVERYONE does. In fact, a lot of people who become therapists do it because they want to help people who were hurt like they were.
It is hard painful work to heal from any type of traumatic past and I do wish that every therapist had to go through their own healing before becoming therapists but that will likely never happen. So we are left with a community of therapists who want to help but are plagued with their own issues, their own opinions and their own prejudices. Just like we all are. They are human too.
If you want to heal and have a better life than you have had so far, stop acting like all the people you are angry with. Healing is possible but you have to lower your protective angry shield to get to it. Anger is a tool used against people and against oneself. It has kept you safe by keeping people at a distance...but in the end it destroys you. YOU are letting them win. Do you really not see that?