I think sexual feelings are very normal and approprite, and even in healing from abuse, alot of what i see posted here i dont feel stems from having been sexually abused but frombeing human beings with exual interests and sex drives, occupation with sex? seems to be more worrisome if you wasnt interested at all. aand masturbation is healthy and normal and begins early in a persons life, self love and self gradification are important, ,, i agree that masturbating gives the person a sense of control and empowerment over their own delves and the feelings they r experiencing at the moment. ,, I can see where it could be very beneficial even in the healing process and learning that arrousal is safe..... thank you for listening,,, KD

Some questioned whether the issues caused from having been sexually abused as a child is more pervasive than just a heightened state of arousal...I think, for most of this, this is absolutely true. It is a life altering and changing event...many refer to it of being robbed of our childhood. I believe this is absolutely true...it knocks us off the normal and natural track toward becoming the person we were meant to be that we were given at birth. It certainly changed me...it is NOT natural for children to be preoccupied with sexual feelings which is what happens to many...the "feeling" are extremely powerful and unless the abuse involved pain and outright trauma,,,they invoke pleasurable feeling....it's so natural for a child to begin chasing those feeling to allow us to feel good when otherwise we experience pain. While for many it's not the case, for me, it became a means of escape and followed me into my adult life. I became an addict. The smallest thing could create that feeling inside and once felt would compel me to chase it.
It produced shame from feeling something was wrong with me it affected my choice of partners, my love relationships, impacted my self esteem...in short I believe it's impacted almost every aspect of my life...I have no doubts my life would have taken a much different track had the abuse not occurred. Without a doubt....it robbed me of a normal childhood. The fact that I'm still after all these years still being affected by it....is a testament to the powerful and life altering impact it had on my life. I thank God through this site and my journaling as well as SAA, educating myself etc I finally broke the back of the obsessive compulsive nature of it on my life...it's allowed me to turn loose of a lot of the shame and blame I carried for so long but issues around my comfortableness with sex and my sexuality remain...recover is a process and one I'll continue to be in until the day I die. So much is trying to reconnect to the person I was before got knocked off track....we are changed by it and often develop a series of "false" selves in our effort to cope and survive....it's like peeling an onion wading through one layer after another. The effects for most of us are profound and it take a lot of courage, grieving the loss, processing the anger and rage etc to reconnect with our true selves. It's exhausting and so grossly unfair and tragic that so many of us should have to struggle so just feel "normal" and just have to deal with the typical problems of life....the abuse is just an added weight and burden...one that was not of our making or choosing. We all just muddle along doing the best we can....and if we're lucky, find a partner who can understand and be there for us during the tough times. Sorry this is so long but the words kept coming...lol

@kinddyke57--Thankyou for your reply to this post. I do understand what you're saying to a certain degree. It's just that I don't know what the normal level or average level of arousal should be, and I can't just go up to people and ask them. But your right, everyone has a sex drive. Some people's are just stronger than other's.

@sadave46--Thankyou for such a positive respone :-) It always awes me to read that you healed yourself. You are definitely an inspiration to all survivors. I didn't think about it until you posted, I agree when you say that it's not natural for children to be so preoccupied with sex. I remember my body being out of control even when I was in elementry school. I couldn't understand anything I was going through. There is more, it's just weird to talk about. And I wonder how do you find your "true" self again, if you've never known that person? Thanks for hearing me out~*