Self-Injury Support Group

Whether you or someone you know or love struggles with self-injury, this is the community to discuss your experience, find support, meet others going through the same, and get advice on how to stop. Working together, we can help find alternative coping skills to reduce the urge to self-harm.

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alimac2009 08/02/2008

"I used to cut, a lot, like just take a broken piece of mirror and scratch the hell out of my arm when im really mad, and after a while of doing that over and over my arm would look like its been shredded. Ok, if I wasnt upset like that it was like a cigarette, I know I'm going to need it soon so I take it now anyways, When its like that and I sort of have time to spare, I cut as deep as I could. Now, here is what I am wondering, I have been off cutting for a little over a year now, and I have been feeling so incredibly homicidal and violent towards those that piss me off, its like I turned it from getting pissed at others and hurting myself to being pissed at others and hurting others....I dont know if I should have even said anything, I would never kill someone, but I feel like it. I just wanted to know if there is anyone else who feels the same way...?
Posted on 07/25/08, 07:07 pm "

I was willing to let this post go to the has beens but now i need help more than ever. I m not so sure i can contain this anymore. I dnt want to sound stupid or anything but i watched the new batman movie...and i fell in love with the joker, and his ways, killing people, without a good reason and all that crap. I was even thinkin about makin identifiable scars like he has but not u know in the same meaning....or place is what i mean. but the thing is is i am actually starting to fight with myself, i have split personalities, one is good, wouldnt hurt anyone, and the other is a homicidal maniac....and the maniac is wanting out now. im even considering actually killing myself to keep from killing others. I need help, really badly, i would appreciate no one callin authorities on me b/c im already going to ask my councilor to just put me away for a while. I just need to know what others think i should do...badly need help,.....

alimac2009 08/03/2008

i just wanted to post a reply to get it back on the recent discussion thing for one more day....and see if anyone would notice.....i give my post one more day....then im going to worry....u should too....

deleted_user 08/03/2008

dear need help, I believe you should probabaly get help. I feel sometimes like i want to hurt iother people and I even day dream about it, but i dont really do it. I fight with my self all the times and even talk to myself in order to calm down. but if you are really wanting to kill someone then plz!!!! turn your self in and get some help. maybe getting professional help would help you.I wish yiou lots of luck and look forward from hearing from you.

alimac2009 08/03/2008

i do have proffessional help, i have had for years now....i just dont know what to do, im withholding myself from hurting anyone but i need to lash out, i need an outlet for this, someone told me to paint or something n iv been trying.....i need some more things to do, some more things that can keep this from bothering me, i need to find one that will work, one that can really help me so i dont have to be put away....im drawing but im scared that if my mom found my pictures...idnt even want to know....im just looking for some advice on what to do to express these feeling without hurting anyone. If i dont express these, i may hurt someone else, and if i am able to restrain myself from hurting someone else, i will end up hurting myself....please....any ideas will b appreciated....

sleepykitten 08/04/2008

I think about killing people a lot too, but whats important to remember about people who kill others in cold blood is that they have no compassion or understanding of human feelings- they suffer from psychopathic behaviour. The fact that you care weather you kill someone or not kinda shows that your probably not capable of it. I agree if your feeling like you could though its best to get help. Just don't worry about it so much, everyone watches movies and gets inspired by them- even if they are about serial killers.

alimac2009 08/04/2008

well i wasnt really inspired by it....it just was like the inner me, in a movie type thing, and i realized that.

deleted_user 08/16/2008

MAN...YOU KNOW WHAT GET HELP..ASAP...HOW CAN YOU EVEN POST SOMETHING LIKE THAT...U KNOW WHAT U ARE FEELING LIKE SO YOU ARE IN CONTROL...WHY WOULD YOU EVER WANT TO MURDER SOMEONE..THAT IS JUST SICK..IM SORRY...BUT I WISH YOU THE BEST..GET HELP ASAP...WILD...I REALLY DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS SITE...IT SEEMS LIKE EVERYONE IS TRYING TO BEAT EACH OTHER WITH THE WORST SENARIOS THEY CAN THINK OF..SORRY HUN..BUT I TELL IT LIKE IT IS...HOPE YOU FIGURE IT OUT...J

tattyhead184 08/16/2008

When I get mad, I find myself punching the air and on the odd occasion I've smashed a mug on the kitchen floor. Breaking something like that can bring some relief, I find. Another thing that springs to mind is joining a Gym and taking it out on the treadmill or by weightlifting - anything to let off steam. I must admit, I scare myself with some of the thoughts I have at times but I know I wouldn't act on them.

Looking at all the issues you're dealing with, i'm not surprised things get on top of you and you feel the way you do. Perhaps try to deal with one small thing at a time to give yourself something to focus on - with help of course. I wish you the best of luck.

cynicalcat 08/16/2008

If you're already getting professional help, have you told your psychiatrist what you're feeling? I know it may be difficult to admit to someone face-to-face, but if your doc doesn't know, then he/she can't help. It sounds like maybe your meds may need to be adjusted to help you cope?

Otherwise, I think tatty had a good suggestion. When I was in college, weight lifting was a great way for me to blow off steam! Have you tried punching pillows? I hear that helps too.

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