Self-Injury Support Group

Whether you or someone you know or love struggles with self-injury, this is the community to discuss your experience, find support, meet others going through the same, and get advice on how to stop. Working together, we can help find alternative coping skills to reduce the urge to self-harm.

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Me or her?

Rainbowsearching
Rainbowsearching
Well not been here for a while......been over a year since I last cut......but now my life's been completely turned upside down and I wanna lash out. I'm struggling to cope with my situation and I crave self harm to help me cope. The dilemma I'm having is that last time I was cutting I nearly lost my partner. She couldn't cope with my depression and the fact that i was cutting again. I stopped for her, she is my reason for living and I couldn't put her through it. Now however I'm torn. I know she is finding our situation tough too and I don't want to add to her stress by falling apart but the longer I resist the blade the harder I'm finding it to cope. Catch 22. Do I tell her in advance that it's what I need to get through this and hope she understands or do I put myself first and just cut anyway and try to hide it? I'm trying so so hard not to do it but every day is getting harder I'm just so scared of loosing her as that would be my life over. Although maybe that's not such a bad thing? I'm not sure what I want anymore, to feel nothing would be good?!?
NightSkye7
NightSkye7
You can try self-harm substitutes such as snapping a rubber band on your wrist, writing on yourself in red marker or nail polish (sometimes over where you snap the band so it seems more real can help), writing down how you are feeling and whats going on and burning it, using distractions that take your full attention such as playing sudoku or doing a crossword, hold ice on your skin for the burning sensation, or talk out your feelings with your partner and tell her how you are feeling and as for help not self-harming (or if you don't want to tell them tell a friend). I hope some of these suggestions can help. Maybe if you can find a substitute that works for you, you wont need to cut and this situation will go away. Feel free to message me if you want to talk, sometimes that can help as well.
CassandraGeds
CassandraGeds
I personally like to tense and untense my muscles 'till they burn. Holding ice cubes is really nice as well.
I'm not encouraging you to cut, but if you really find nothing else is helping, then you need to speak up. Talk to her about it, you never know, she may help you feel better. However, you always need to be prepared for this risk. Maybe a night crying? It's easy to give advice untill you're in the situation.

What I would personally do is try the sutitutes, and if that doesn't work then I'd try to hide it. But that would be the LAST thing I did.