Self-Injury Support Group
Whether you or someone you know or love struggles with self-injury, this is the community to discuss your experience, find support, meet others going through the same, and get advice on how to stop. Working together, we can help find alternative coping skills to reduce the urge to self-harm.
So, a few months ago my parents found out about my cutting again. They forced me into therapy that I managed to get out of and everyone seems to be happy enough. But I know my mother at least is keeping an eye on me to make sure I'm not hurting myself anymore. I was able to get by for a while, but started burning myself a few weeks ago because I needed to hurt myself and no one will notice burns on my arms (and I feel my scars have to stay on my arms; they're familiar there).
Burning is, I guess, working as a place-holder for cutting. But I really, really miss cutting. I gave up last week and cut my hips to pieces. I miss bleeding, having to clean up after myself, having to calm myself to stop the bleeding (if I've cut too deep). I guess I miss all the ritual associated with cutting.
And now my suicidal thoughts have come back for the first time in three years. I don't want to die, I'm happy. Everything's great. But I can't shake the thoughts. Like, I don't want to die but I want to off myself. Does that make any sense? (no) I know that if I cut the feelings will go away, for a while at least.
I don't know what I'm trying to get at anymore. Anyone else feel like this, or have any advice or anything? Hell, I don't know. I'm sorry.
Burning is, I guess, working as a place-holder for cutting. But I really, really miss cutting. I gave up last week and cut my hips to pieces. I miss bleeding, having to clean up after myself, having to calm myself to stop the bleeding (if I've cut too deep). I guess I miss all the ritual associated with cutting.
And now my suicidal thoughts have come back for the first time in three years. I don't want to die, I'm happy. Everything's great. But I can't shake the thoughts. Like, I don't want to die but I want to off myself. Does that make any sense? (no) I know that if I cut the feelings will go away, for a while at least.
I don't know what I'm trying to get at anymore. Anyone else feel like this, or have any advice or anything? Hell, I don't know. I'm sorry.
deleted_user
i feel the same way. i havent cut in a long time but turning to burning was a nice change. my wrist is full of cig size burn marks. i miss the rush of emotions when cutting, lthough i know its not an acceptable coping mechanism. im trying to talk things out to avoid the feeling of needing to self harm. i dont think im much help, but know, you are not alone in this struggle
dinorachel
Thank you so much. :)
deleted_user
don't apologize for posting how you feel and reaching out. That's what we are here for, to listen and help (((hugs)) I'm really sorry you're struggling. I'm here if you need anything
deleted_user
I have this feeling too. I cut my hips apart for a long time, but if you don't want to die, just remember that you can cut into your femoral artery. I am so addicted to cutting and how calm it makes me feel. I don't know how to stop. I did for a long time and then it came back 2 weeks ago and I found myself just slicing away. I agree with jcaution, I am no help, but I am here for you if you need to talk anytime. You aren't alone.
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