Hi I've only been here once before. I agree that it's aggravating/angering when people show off their SI's, but we are all part of the same community - to have a need to show off scars comes from some of the same deepseated issues that those of us who don't show off have. I have always been a hider, long sleeves in summer etc. It was never for show. And it has become a sort of fashionable fad right now, which is highly distressing. And yes is sometimes frusterates me becuase i don't want to be grouped with the "doing it for attention crowd,but the need to cut and show comes from a place of great pain as well. We all have to have understanding and compassion for everyone dealing with self-injury issues. And after a certain point in my life (I'm 37, started cutting at ten and then burning in my twenties) i stopped caring what people thought when it's 97 degrees out. I don't want to make people uncomfortable, but i know myself and my motivations. Most "normal" people will never understand either way. I consider my scars war wounds, god knows i fought hard to try to keep from inflicting them upon myself. Luckily, I've managed largely to get away from self-injury, and I hope that all of you still caught up in the devastating cycle will be able to get to this point too. I haven't escaped completly but the last time i cut was almost a year ago and the last time i burned was over four years ago. at one time i did it at least four or five times a week, sometimes daily. I am lucky that i am olive complected and heal well - now my left arm just looks like the skin is kind of mottled. Lately, as one of the medications i take for bipolar disorder has started wearing off, i have started to have the urge again, but hopefully with the help of this site and all of you sharing yourselves here i can stay "straight". I am currently working on a re-write of an essay i am writing on my personal motivations for self-injury, as well as my methods for dealing with the fallout. I will post it on my journal page when it is finished, and it is my greatest hope that i can help some people. best wishes and hugs to all :)

I see the point y'all are making, but perhaps there's more to this than you're all giving this girl credit for. When I first did it, I didn't necessarily show it off, but I did make a point that some people knew I was doing it.
In the beginning, it was a cry for help. As time went on, I didn't want anyone to take it away from me, so I quit being open about it.
Don't judge this girl. Just because what she gets from cutting is different than what you get doens't mean that its just as vital to her life as it is to her.
Remember, in the end, the action is the same.

see i use to weare long sleves in 90 degree wether but that changes when ur in second role of church and puke right in front of the pastor while he is preaching. I still hide a lot of my scars but i aint gonna kill my self either if i make a mark on lower arm i pray no one notice in the summer in the winter i aint got no prob hiding it. Those who actually go around parading it r those that get to me yeah they need help but y do the rest of us have to be called stuff becuase of them.

i hate that, its happened to me and they thought i wanted attention, it really bothers me.

I understand what you meen... But when i first started doing it i was the same way. I didn't know how to handle it or even why i was doing it for that matter. but the longer i did it the more i realized it wasn't something to show off. Now it's something i feel ashamed of. And when i see people looking at my scars i freak out. because it sacres me to think about what they think of me... So maybe the girl in your class is going through the same thing.

HELL YES I fucking hate people like that.

Hmm well my ex told me once tht he got so upset at one point in time & he was gonna cut himself. I didnt kno wat to say so i jus stayed quiet, i dont see him ever doin tht. I told him about how i use to cut, & he never judge me. But i think tht he got tht idea frm me, i dont remember him telling me tht he cuts, i think he said tht he did tht at one point in time but hardly ever. So tht was wierd to me, but idk kno if he cuts now or not. But im sure thts not his way of dealing with his problems so tht was wierd wen he said tht. & why wud she show it off? thts soo stupid, if i was to show my scars id hav to be hospitalized again & i dont want tht.

I'm glad some people are seeing both sides of the coin here.

Maybe she *is* doing it for attention. If so, she desperately needs the attention, yes? What makes her need for attention any less important than any of our issues? Or maybe it's a cry for help. A lot of people start cutting just so people will finally see how much they're hurting and understand that need help.

Maybe she's *not* doing it for attention. Maybe she just doesn't care what other people think. I sure as hell hope *I* don't feel like I need to hide my scars forever (should I survive this nightmare). They're part of who I am and what I've gone through. I don't want to live the rest of my life in shame.

The point is - you don't know what's going on with her, so don't judge based on ignorance. You're afraid people are going to do the same to you so why in the world would you do it to her? Other people's reactions, assumptions, etc. aren't her fault - they're the fault of an un-educated and un-caring public.