"Everyone has pain. It is just a part of getting older."

"If you would get up and move more, you wouldn't be so tired all the time."

"I worked out extra last night, so I hurt too."

These are the gems I get.

My pinky finger is bending.

My knee hurts, do you think I have arthritis?

If you just took a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar daily you would be cured.

Conversely:
You need to take a teaspoon baking soda morning and night.

Do the gluten free diet, the Paddison diet...be a vegan, eat plant based meals and you will be normal again.

I posted on Facebook that I'm in a raging flare up. Someone suggested I find a warm pool.

I replied: Thanks but I can't live in the pool.

I'm on pred to hold me over....

Thanks for the explanation...

Thanks linzsey, blood cell explanation makes sense! Yeah Gal, I cut pred from 5 to 4 for March no problem after first two weeks, from 4 to 3 for April and problems that didn't improve so in May back to 4 and tolerable again.

Typing this keyed a song in my head I've not heard in a very long time by the Ohio Players, Roller coaster.

Even my husband still only hears "arthritis" and says, "wait until you're MY age". He thinks if I just stop doing anything, nothing will hurt. Sometimes I wonder why I don't complain more so he would have a clue. Anyway, I confess that I didn't know what RA was until I was diagnosed, but I don't think I would comment on something I knew nothing about. Hang in all. I'm going someplace warm next week and hope to God I can climb that pyramid!

A "new" related problem has entered my life.

I let friends know I was in a flare. I skipped several social, and group events Then suddenly yesterday, after finishing the pred. I had a gold-star day! I was dancing while doing my housework and I went out on Saturday night and danced somewhere. It was an even in my community and several of the people i told I was in flare were there and saw me dancing..

Now I worry that people will think I'm a faker, a hypochondriac or a slacker. I told a friend today and she said not to worry and not apologize. Chronic illness and chronic pain are hard to explain. People that don't have a chronic illness do not know about good days and bad.

I know I "shouldn't" worry what people think, but I do. ALSO, I am confused myself. I see doc Tuesday and don't know what to do about starting a new med. If I was in a flare, why would just 9-10 days on a pred wean fix it - I never expected for the results I felt on pred to stay with me after I stopped it. I feel little aches here and there, and require more sleep ow that I'm off it, but...

I'm confused.

Thanks LINZSEY! :-) ♥

I thought Psoriatic Arthritis was the most misunderstood disease, RA gets all the press and research funding...

The invalidation and ignorance of others is frustrating, and continues to surprise me. The most supportive people around me are the ones I hold close to. I've had rheumatoid for 26 years and I'm 31 years old. I am a white, thin, blonde haired woman with a Master's degree, licensed in Social Work and people assume I don't struggle. I have struggled greatly. I did not have an easy upbringing and I have physical ailments and mental health diagnoses. When I try to explain things to others (besides my support system), it is minimized simply because I'm not overweight or single or whatever else people's preconceived notions may be. My husband's family, whom I've known for 9 years refuses to understand me and I've given up on trying to explain why I can't see them as often as I would like to. Their shaming and critical comments affect me and I wish things were different with them because I am family oriented. I wish they could love me for who I am because I think I'm a pretty cool person. Haha.

Anyway- RA consumes my every day life. If I do not hold rheumatoid as number 1 in my life by taking care of myself 24/7 then it bites me in the ass and demands my full attention, requiring me to lay in bed and focus on what medication I need to take next so I can just make it to the bathroom or wash my face for the day. My most recent MRI's from 2015 reveal 10 years of deformity in my back, neck, hands and feet. I struggle to walk and hold things in my hands. The thing I struggle with the most is feeling like a burden to my loved ones. I truly hate having a big heart but only being able to show how much I love them in small portions of time because of my physical pain and fatigue. I want more out of life. I carry two backpacks with me: one for my job and every day life (essentially a purse) where I hold a water bottle, my wallet, gum, sunglasses, snacks aka the basics. And the other backpack is filled with medications, vitamins, creams, essential oils, etc.

I used to be able to hold a full time job, go to college full time, volunteer at church and play sports. But now I can barely hold a job. I try very hard to balance my life but my efforts fail me. I'm grateful I have a husband who adores me, good health insurance, family, friends, 3 pets, but I have other desires that I will never be able to experience because of the rheumatoid. I don't think I will have children. I suppress that desire because I can barely make it on my own, let alone care for a child. I desperately want to have a child that resembles my husband. I want a child that could experience my mom and sister's unconditional love as well as play with their 15 cousins. I want to be able to travel. I only travel to Virginia to see my twin sister and while I'm there, she has to care for me. It sucks. I'm a prideful person and I just want to feel a sense of independence again. In high school and college, I was the one in the family who was the rock and would pay for things and care for others, but now I'm the one who is helpless.

My therapist informed me of this forum and I'm grateful for it because I feel validated and have a sense of normalcy reading other people's comments of how RA affects their life and their loved ones. This is my first comment because I didn't have the humility or the vulnerability to explain my thoughts until today...until my twin sister and her adorable 3 children came into town and I can barely spend time with them because of the pain and fatigue.

Thank you for letting me share my thoughts. God bless you and may you continue to fight the dark distortions our mind can trail to when we are burdened with the every day battle of the rheumatoid arthritis. Xoxo

So sorry for your struggle. What are you taking?

Warrier - In response to your initial post. I just had to fill out an insurance application. I checked the box for Immune disorders, only to find RA lower on the list under Bones/Muscles. An insurance company!

That is CLASSIC of the way it is misunderstood and mis-classified!

I deal with the same thing all the time on dr intake forms where they ask you to check illnesses you have had. Section on liver disease - i check it only to find hepatitis listed separately. What is hepatitis if not a liver disease? It's defined as "an inflammatory condition of the liver."