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Got a new job!

Group FounderEmpoweredOKC
EmpoweredOKC
Okay, it's time for a career change, after all these years. I hope nobody is startled by this, because it's a really lucrative opportunity for me.

I'm hiring on at a local ranch owned by Tyson Foods. My two jobs will include painting the dye lines on burger patties for public school lunch programs, and a position called "chicken sexer", where I will have to sort baby chicks by gender.

The downside is that Fridays and Saturdays are the busiest nights, so I'll need to cancel the wilderness retreat.

I hope everyone understands, and can share in my good news with me!
deleted_user
deleted_user
lol you're a jerk and a terrible april fool-ser matt!!!!! okay just kidding about the jerk part...
deleted_user
deleted_user
and p.s this was only funny after an hour of crying that there was no more retreat, until i had an ah-hah moment about the date....hah "chicken sexerrr" how did i fall for that?
deleted_user
deleted_user
Oh Haha Matt.....I opened this and I started crying.
Especially with so many people having fears over this you'd pull this prank? Yeah real funny Matt.
I opened this and started to cry, I was so devastated...but I'm glad that you got to make your joke Matt...I'm not going to be a 'good sport' over this. It really hurt my feelings
finalytime
finalytime
The sad part of this joke...is that those jobs actually do exist. At least the chicken sorter one. Jokes need to be part reality so the fact that you were working for Tyson Foods would mean you would be working with full grown chickens not chicks since there is very litte meat on chicks...so it gave it away right away..The even sadder part....that I know that!
Spent a week out east and toured an actual chicken farm...ick..be thankful you have the job you do!!! You'd never eat anything but organic chicken meat again if you knew what the Tyson company feeds their chicks to make them grow so fast....its nasty!
finalytime
finalytime
Even nastier the stuff they put in their burger pattys and how they actually get the lines on those burgers....they had a whole show on Dirty Jobs....
Group FounderEmpoweredOKC
EmpoweredOKC
Sorry, Kardy, I thought by making the whole thing so ludicrous, it would be evident.
deleted_user
deleted_user
lol April Fools right back-at-cha :) I'm a pretty good sport about most things lol
Group FounderEmpoweredOKC
EmpoweredOKC
I actually used "Dirty Jobs" website for ideas on the wackiest jobs I could find, to ham it up.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Yeah I thought at first that you were being honest and my eyes went wide and my body got all hot. Then I read the first reply. Good one. =-D My first comment would have probably been...umm...care to share in your description of what a lucrative opportunity is? LOL. <3 Dirty Jobs. =-D
deleted_user
deleted_user
That was baddddd! You are a lot more creative than that! :)
Group FounderEmpoweredOKC
EmpoweredOKC
Kardy, you suck. I was really feeling like a crumb.

But that was a good one.

Seriously, though, I love your humor. I'm laughing with Tonya.
Group FounderEmpoweredOKC
EmpoweredOKC
Well, my first idea was to tell people I was going to DJ at a strip club on Friday and Saturday nights, so no retreat, but Tonya was nervous that the wrong people would see the post, take it seriously, and use it against me later out of context. That has happened in the past. So I went with "Dirty Jobs" instead.
deleted_user
deleted_user
lol It's a good thing you keep Tonya around, she sounds like she keeps you in line for the better haha.
but i do see you more of a "chicken sexer" than a "strip club DJ"...if you can find a compliment somewhere in there you are welcome to it lol
deleted_user
deleted_user
:P
Oh Matt you can dish it out but can't take it? hehehe
deleted_user
deleted_user
LMFAO!!!!!