The ropes thing was a half day out of 3 and a half thing and I still felt that way...

I'm feeling free to disagree. :)

I really enjoy the option to have activities that will help strengthen my healing. I appreciate the social bonding time, and also as a new person last year felt a little out of place when there weren't structured things going on.

I like the idea of horse-time.

And also agree that the time went really fast in general.

I loved the activity last year. I do see where Heptet is coming from. It was so special to have others outside of the first sweat. We did not get to participate in their sweat the same way. It is just as important to be able to be outside as in inside. I am wondering if there is a way to accommodate the activity and be able to be present for both sweats.

I would absolutely love this, but it will be my first time. This is Stephanie,{RAR Member}.

Nice to see Stehtfest and Unfurling here. Have missed you both. Great recovery going on on my part. I couldn't log back on with my old name because of my terrible memory problems.

Feel free to add me if you want. I plan on going.

This is a great idea!

I’ve done this once many years ago at a ranch in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains somewhere between Denver and Colorado Springs. My therapist at the time thought it would be a good idea, and how right he was!

We spent the morning riding in a corral and later moved to a trail. It was awesome! The actual riding was more about us getting centered, staying in the now, getting acquainted with creatures physically much more powerful than us and learning to trust them, learning to be assertive etc. – except as I’m not entirely new to horses and riding, it was mostly about getting centered for me. And riding in that majestic scenery was breathtaking.

After this we had lunch and group therapy. There were about 12 of us in the group with 2 therapists and a nurse. The extraordinary experience of riding with other rape survivors did open us up in a different way than usual, so the therapy ended up being very rewarding.

When the therapy ended the nurse asked me if I wanted to go riding again, and heck yes I did! The others left, but she and I got fresh horses and chose another trail for the rest of the afternoon. The ranch owner didn’t even charge us for it! It was beyond cool!

I’m European, so the first time out they had saddled and bridled my horse with European gear, as it’s what I’m used to. But the second time around I used an American saddle – it felt really weird at first, but as it turned out, it was far easier to ride with that along the sometimes fairly steep slopes of the foothills. The slopes were very dry as you can imagine – lots of sand and loose rocks, so the riding was quite challenging at times.

Bottom line: I highly recommend this.

If we do this, the "horse group" is limited to 10-12 people. That mean we either need a cutoff for signing up, or we need to book two days. It also means planning travel logistics--if enough people have cars to carpool, that's great. If not, it means renting a passenger van and adding that to the cost calculations.

Here's the other thing it means. The cost is $100 per person for a half-day including food. I could either cover the cost myself at the expense of having a musical performance this year, or I could ask people who want to sign up to be willing to cover the expense. Bear in mind that we're getting a discount anyway because the group who runs the programs wants to help us out. But there's no way to cover rising food, rental and insurance costs, PLUS program expenses, without changing some part of the equation.

Im out simply because its doubtful I will make the retreat now.

Is that because you don't like the equine idea?

No! I like the idea I was just expressing my concerns of how any activity that divides us affected my experience. But I still would have been one of the people wanting to go and meet the horses :)

My home situation is so unstable right now. If flights weren't so expensive I'd be alright but they are what they are. Honestly, I'm trying to pretend the reality of not being able to come exists. I have this worry every year but I usually have a steady income and that isn't the case this year.

One day I will set up something to help others with travel costs. Could spend my time raising awareness and fundraising :)

I like the activities. I think it would be fun if we all go, weather we participate or not. I have even mentioned to Starbuck, that we could bring some of the ropes course activities to the retreat center as group activities. It was amazing to me how we all worked together, I think for the people that went last year it was a good time, even if they (I) could not do the high ropes stuff, it was good to watch and cheer on those that tried and be there for them. It was amazing to see women, step out of a comfort zone and spread their wings and fly. Everyone, took away their own experiences that day. It was really cool! Even though I was not able to climb high (fear of heights) it was a huge accomplishment just to try. And trusting each other was another plus. I learned a lot about myself that day. It was not all good, but I do not regret it at all.

I need to hear more feedback about the options of being willing to cover a higher cost for the horses.

Bear in mind that this time there will not be a "guest speaker"--we just don't have the time or need, so we'd only have a musical performance. And bear in mind that the horse riding is limited to 10-12 people, so I'm not asking anyone to pay the cost who can't or would rather not--it is only for those who find it appealing.

This has the double benefit of not taking up extra time that we'd rather spend socially (by not having speaking AND another activity), and only making a cost difference for those who choose it. The non-profit who provides the horse riding event asks for $100 for a half day, including food, to cover their costs and pay their staff. Which anyone who's ever done a horse activity knows, is a fantastic bargain.

More retreat information will be forthcoming, as I'm in negotiations with the church.

Yup, this certainly is a bargain, and considering the benefits of the bonding experience and everything else, it would be so worth it.

I wish I could come and join you guys, but I only recently got back from a trip abroad, which means my bank account refuses to speak to me for the time being. And my Harley needs to have a couple of parts replaced, which will make whatever’s left of my account shut down until further notice.

If this turns into the success I know it has the potential of being, maybe you’ll consider doing it another year too, so I could join?

You never know! Each year, we wait to see how it goes before deciding what happens next. If all is good, it'll continue. Someday when it's clear it's run its course, we'll let it go. So it depends on the feelings we get each year.

Fair enough! *keeping fingers crossed*