Rape Support Group
If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.
I feel like since Ive decided to try to heal myself from this, Its only become more hard to deal with. I joined a support group at WOAR and have went a few times, it is helpful and insightful but when I leave and Im back into my life outside of group, I find myself drowing. Some days my anxiety and depression gets so heavy that I literally feel like Im choking on it. It feels like I swallowed a plastic bag. My chest aches and my lungs hurt from trying to catch my breath. My support system is EXTREMLY small. Like 1 person small. I feel like I cant trust anyone. I feel like people are judging me all the time. Some days Im able to force a smile out or look happy on the outside but every single day I am dying on the inside. Screaming. I just want to be happy. I just want to enjoy life. I know that in order for me to move forward, I have come to terms with what has happened to me. But doing that is easier said than done. Coming to terms with this kind of trauma is easily the hardest thing Ive ever done. I feel like Im losing myself. Like Im losing my life.
Once upon a time, there was a little window, and all he wanted to do was grow up and be put in a beautiful house and be the perfect happy window. Eventually, the little window grew up and was picked up to be loaded into a truck to be taken to his permanent happy place. On the way to the truck, the man carrying the trucked dropped the window at the curb and it shattered into hundreds of pieces. The little window was devastated, how could he ever be the perfect happy window again, for now, he was all broken and dirty.
The owner of the store hear the sound of the window shattering and came out with a broom and a dustpan, and swept up every piece of glass, making sure he missed none and took the broken shattered window back into the store. The window was so scared, he knew this was the end, he would be thrown away because he was broken, and useless now. But instead of throwing him away the Windowmaker set him on the counter and started separating out the dirt from the shattered glass pieces, the window was very confused. He asked the window maker, what are you doing? I am broken and shattered and useless. The Window Maker looked at the shattered pieces and said yes you are broken and shattered, and some all of your pieces are stained from mixing with the oil and water at the curb. It will take me a long time, but I can smooth out your edges and put you back together, You won't be the window that you were, but you will be a beautiful stained glass window. It did take a lot of time, years, in fact, Somedays the Window was sad or depressed, it was taking so long to be fixed, Then the day came and the Window Maker said there, we are finished, I will hold you up to a mirror so you can look at yourself before we sell. He picked up the window and walked to the mirror, The Window looked at himself and was in awe, for now, he was not a plain window but a beautiful stained glass window.
Like I said I'm sure I didn't do as good as job as what I originally read it as, but I like it.
@bsnuggles41 I absolutely LOVED that story! That is one way to look at being broken, one day we all will be a beautiful master piece. thank you so much for sharing that with me!