I know what you mean;..It consumed all my thoghts for a while too..
I always told myself why are crying nothing happened..
I said that for a long time..until I had to face it..it happened.thats when I began to disassociate..thats were i am now..kinda numb..just there..I think about it and dont cry....and somethimes just dont feel anything aout anything..it sucks,,.its just consuming my life in a different way now..wow I was gunna give you suport here and ended up telling you whats up with me...sorry needed to vent..point is your not alone

Love, I am sorry to hear that it is consuming you so much. I can tell you that denial does not work. It's the one thing that I learned after struggling for so long; denial only makes the situation worse. The longer you deny and try to suppress your emotions, the more they will pop up when your mind has time to rest. My counselor told me that when I wake up; spend 10 minutes on it. That way you aren't suppressing it, you are dealing with it. Yes, at first I would dwell for longer than 10 minutes and it would pop up through the day. As time progressed.. my thoughts got smaller. I still think about it, and it still hurts.. but I do think about it much less than I normally do. Try it.. it won't hurt; would it?

Let me know if you need anything love and I wish you the best.

Sorry to hear your having problems. My fiance and I are having a very long break from this because I disassociate - it feels like I'm being traumatised all over again. I am just getting some help with this at the moment X Don't let it get you down as it's completely normal and natural what is happening. X X

trying to make yourself believe that nothing ever happened...or trying to make yourself avoid the situation/subject altogether isn't healthy. i'm saying this from experience...i'm not trying to be right or anything...

i tried telling myself that it never happened...that i was okay...even though, deep down inside i felt like i was dead...just an empty shell...

there's no real way to not think about it...the more you try not to think about it, the more you think about it...not trying to sound depressing...

my advice, though it might be hard...is to keep your communication lines with your fiancee open. i remember when my husband and i would try to make love...it'd only get so far as kissing and holding and i'd start freaking out...

i'd feel stupid for killing it...and i'd feel guilty for feeling so dirty and ashamed. i'd hate myself for "leading him on" and just stopping...but he'd talk to me. i didn't really believe him when he told me that it was okay...or that he understood...but with time, i learned to really trust and believe him...

i'm here for you if ever you need someone to talk to...i hope that i helped...at least a little if anything...

I have it on the mind a lot too but still don't know how to get it off. I know where you are coming from though. It all stinks!

I can't tell you that it will never leave your mind. I can tell you from someone that has dealt with it and denied many things for a long time that denial won't do it. It will just make it worse...prime example is myself. Start healing yourself, therapy, keep a journal here or at home, get it out. If you don't, it will destroy the beautiful person that you are...