Hi Tabatha - I'm so sorry to hear about that. The first thing that you may need to do is find out if he is on board with both of you stopping. A habit such as this can be very expensive and cause problems when it comes to paying bills on time and ensuring other responsibilities are taken care of. You may need to establish that you both need to stop and make a commitment to stop together. How does he feel about it?

I have asked him for us both to stop and it goes ok for a day or two, but then he gives into temptation again. We pay what bills we have on time. But the problem we have is we can't find our own place to live because we're spending so much money buying pills every week. I tried begging him to stop so we can get our own place, but so far it's done no good. I'm so depressed and feel misunderstood when it comes to him. I don't know what to do anymore...

The one thing you have got to figure out is if he is willing to detox and go to treatment. if not you may have to go your own path.

also i would try to start to go to NA meetings. you can check out www.intherooms.com to meet other addicts and get some perspective on the situation

Why are you waiting for his permission to clean up your side of the street? You may have to start this without him. Good job, reaching out! That's the way to start.

Tortoise

It sounds like you both suffer from the disease of addiction! 98 percent of addicts who try to quit cannot do so without help. Your situation will only get worse unless you do something about it now.

Contact your local substance abuse program. Most hospitals have one. The longest I was able to stay clean was 3 weeks but having a bottle of pain pills in the next room was too big of a trigger for me. I had to make alot of life changing decisions to avoid my triggers, like getting rid of any pain pills, getting rid of all my drug friends, going to 12 step meetings, relapse prevention group counseling, etc. I did everything my counselors suggested and I have been clean and sober for over 3 years now.

It wasn't easy. It took months for the cravings to go away and for me to feel like the old me. I needed alot of support. to get me through.

Your biggest trigger will be your husband! There is no way one can quit without the other. It possible maybe because anything's possible but not likely.

Sometimes we build traps for ourselves that are very difficult to get out of. The key to yours will be an in or outpatient program, or a 12 step program, or both! I really hope to see you on the road to recovery sometime soon. I have seen so many people start innocently just like you, only to wind up on death's doorstep! I was one such person but God decided to keep me alive for some reason and I have never been happier!

God Bless and TC!

Thank you for y'alls advice. Unfortunately, I don't have insurance or a job so going to a 12 step program or something of that nature is hard. Most want insurance plus a copay or money for other fees that insurance doesn't cover. As far as the NA meetings I don't even know where one is around here and my transportation is limited until I can get my transmission fixed. It seems like every time I reach out for help something goes wrong :\

12 step programs are free so the only thing keeping you away is transportation and finding one. Try going to this link (http://www.aa.org/lang/en/central_offices.cfm?origpage=373) and click on your state to see if you can find some nearby. I think tortoise is right about how you can start on your own and hopefully your husband joins you. There are also recovery places that are free and don't require insurance. You would be away from your husband if you went to one of those, but it would let you get clean and maybe find a job. You could start googling and calling places. My wife is in one that starts as a rehab but grants more freedom as you stay in the program and becomes like a halfway house. You might be able to find something like this for him, too. Anyway....just ideas...

If you choose a program through your hospital, you can get it for free. All hospitals are federally subsidized and have to provide services for free to those who cannot afford to pay or have no insurance so don't let that keep you away!

I think I sense a little fear but believe me, we all had fear in the beginning! I remember procrastinating because I did not want to get involved in something I didn't understand. It's quite normal and those who will be helping you understand this.

Be brave and you will be glad you did!

God Bless!

Tabatha,
I have found a list of all the places in your area that offer both inpatient and support groups for substance abuse.

90% of these should offer indiegent beds for around 2 dollars a day, or allow you to make payment arrangments. WHERE THERE IS A WILL , THERE IS A WAY! .. They won't turn away someone for inability to pay.. PLEASE GO.. and check them out.. make them aware of your finanical situation, these people are willing to work with you! ..

If you have medicaide , you are entitled to FREE transportation, as litsted on the back of your card, to and from all doctors appointment's . A case manager / or social worker at one of these places can help you set it up. Its worth at least going and talking to someone about.

They cannot keep you invoulentairly.. I see people in your position all the time.. and it breaks my heart when they are unwilling to commit to the program, as there are lots of people willing to help , and make arrangements .. The help is out there for you and your husband.. if you want it.. Please take it. -- Quitting Rx meds is an incredibly difficult thing to do alone.. without any support system.

http://www.211connectsalabama.org/MatchList.aspx?c35640;Hartselle;3921;;;0;41143;Mental Health/Substance Abuse/Crisis Services;Substance Abuse Counseling;220;Residential Substance Abuse Treatment Facilities~

http://www.211connectsalabama.org/MatchList.aspx?c35640;Hartselle;3921;;;0;41143;Mental Health/Substance Abuse/Crisis Services;Substance Abuse Counseling;220;Residential Substance Abuse Treatment Facilities~

there is always a community mental health center that has financial assistance programs or sliding fee scales. I really think your willingness must reach a point of no return for anything to happen. You keep turning down advice. Sometimes at least for me its a life or death situation. Maybe ya'll must hit your bottom first.

You can really use the help that nurse23 suggested! You will get help for your other issues that predispose you to addiction! Life has not been good to you but you will one day be happy if you look into treatment!

God Bless!