It is now August 14th (might even be the 15th where you are).

It sounds like it might be time to see a doctor about what you're experiencing. I know it seems scary and overwhelming, but you can do it.

Stay strong. It'll probably be the best thing for you in the long run. We're here for support, always, but we can only do so much from where we are. Allow a professional to help you now. I hope everything works out. Gentle hugs.

okay? im freaking out its midnight... something is wrong with me???

Well, what you're describing here sounds like you're explaining that you're losing huge chunks of time, and you're unaware of things you're doing.

Is that wrong? I'm sorry if I misunderstood and I hope you'll correct me.

hi Love, not to worry. it may feel scary right now, but i'm sure it isn't as scary as it feels, ok? do you remember me? LIlyl?

um you guys type on the last post but do really remember alll of you.. like i feel numb...

like when i think about my adopted dad i feel sortof a sadish feeling i dont know why... when i try to think of my birth mom i feel sick i still dont know why... i am have a hard time remember me.. like a part of me is not there.. i feel blank... i can barely remember my age... its like im forgetting my name... like everything is disappering... i feel guilty for no reason... i feel a little dissy in a way my stumic is sortof turning... my head is spinning but nothin is connecting... my eyes keep blurring in and out of vision... i cant sleep... its 2 in the morning...

One analogy I like for the confusion of emerging memories is, "Stepping in a muddy creek." The harder I stomp, the muddier the waters get. If I *just* sit quietly and wait for the waters to clear, I am soon able to see what lies beneath the surface.

Gentle empathy, Everlasting. It do get confusing, by any analogy. Steadying support while you sort.

Everlasting.Love, when I was in the place you're in as to short term memory being on the fritz while long term memories were becoming overwhelming, it scared me, too. The more I struggled, though, to get short and long term memory back under my control, the more it seemed to get worse, which in my case triggered panic attacks for me. I'm a college instructor by profession, so using memory for teaching lectures is a job skill.

I let my doctor help me, and it started to relax me. At the same time, he started to give me memory aids for teaching, just tips and so on that I still use today, years later. I'd definitely let my doc in on what's going on because it sounds really familiar as to when long term memory emerged for me and interfered with my short term memory. It was only temporary, and went away once I dealt with those long term memories that had been repressed for so long and surfaced when it was time for them to be processed. I ended up being a more whole person from it once I did.

but the thing is i dont want my memoirys back... at least i dont think i want them back