Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
i was married to a man in 1994 that beat me almost everyday. He had several affairs, some being with “friends” of mine. Since our divorce almost 20 years ago, I still have issues trusting anyone. I’m remarried and my current husband was what I thought the answer to my prayers. We’ve had several issues since we’ve been married. Mainly trying to combine two families into one. New Year’s Day I asked him about something that his daughter had blurred out. Well he flipped on me. He told me that he hated me, he told me that his grandchild, a child I’ve been raising as my own since he was 2 months old was NOTHING to me. He told his 9 year old daughter that lives with us that i hate her. He told me that it’s no wonder that Ive divorces because im a psych bitch. So, i took 56 Xanax. He didn’t even believe me. My mama showed up and called 911. I spent 3 days in the BHU at our local hospital. When i got home, he was pissed. His word! He told me that his 9 year old knew i took the pills and even what if i would have dropped one and the baby picked it up. Not, we need counseling or I’m so glad that i didn’t lose my wife.
I have an appointment with a psychiatrist next Friday, but I keep replaying everything over and over in my head. I keep thinking of how i have given up my life to raise a family that i love and never regret having, and then to be told they are nothing to me. His response to me is I only want attention.
Our issues have caused a major problem with my work. Too upset to go in, or i can’t focus while there. So now i feel like there isn’t anywhere else for me to go. His words hurt 10 times worse than the punches that i had come accustomed to getting.
This isn’t living anymore. My exhusband made me this way. Everything that went wrong in his life was my fault. I learned how to take the abuse and bite my tongue. Now, the past is causing the issues in my present.
Im so lost and i don’t know what to do.
-
I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
-
First, I hope everyone is doing well, and continuing to fight that good fight! Keep up the great work on yourselves; I'm rooting for all of you!So, I started doing therapy at the beginning of the year, when I was in my most depressed state, but with my therapist, I made big changes and steps in the right direction. But, over a month ago, she couldn't take my insurance anymore, and I had to stop...
Lost you may be but you have just made two solid steps toward finding your way: 1) Made an appointment with a psychiatrist and 2) Joined a peer support group. That's a pretty good start. Easy does it. Just those two steps can be enough to start your healing journey.
And it's okay to want attention here. We all need to be listened to and to know we are not alone.
Welcome aboard.
But still "hate" is a very strong word, did he really mean that or just want to be hurtful? Perhaps you both need to learn to fight fair during arguments so it's easier to patch things up. If he was just saying that to get you to stop a behaviour then consider not doing it again and saying sorry, perhaps he hates the behaviour not you?
Taking a little bit of responsibility in reaction to his behaviour will feel loads better than being a victim. Your part maybe very small, but that's something you have power over. Whether it be changing your insides, or changing the situation
Long term issues are enough to push anyone over into an explosion. We all want a happy stress free home life. What are your mutual tactics for achieving this??? The blame game isn't going to solve anything here.
Ask him if things could change for the better if he wants to stick with you while those changes happen???
Maybe do that once things blow over a bit, if you are prepared for both answers. If he doesn't hate you he just hates the long term stress of the family dynamic time to agree to sit down and problem solve with a bit of logic
Have you ever watched super nanny? It gives some good advice on structure and discipline and talking positively and family time
Once your both on board team players you can both research stuff on Google and books and family therapy to try and get past these issues.
Your overall aim will be to go for very long periods with non abusive behaviours happening and to do nice stuff often
When crap blows up do HALT rewind what just got said our done and how was that understood by everyone to cause the fight???
Hopefully with good intentions the knot of misunderstandings and inconsiderate behaviour will change and get less in time
At last you'll have achieved a happy family home. Don't mess it up by talking bad about each other! Share that to confidential trustworthy others
I know family dynamics can change and you can all be a lot happier.
If however his poor attitude towards you is that he hates you and that's irreversible for him in his opinion. Then. Maybe it's time to think about leaving???
Maybe staying with someone your On bad terms with is better than leaving, in which case keep posting join support groups perhaps try Al-anon where people who have lived with difficult others learn ways to cope or change or move on
Unfortunately alot of people get angry and abusive in reaction to self harm and over doses. Ask yourself if you could not have coped with your distress in a better way???
Try dbt??
Offering some hope for some solutions here! Hope you feel better soon
I really hate this life.