Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
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I question everything, whether the answer has value, or not. I am not ready to audition for game shows, but my trivia repertoire is quite massive. Some days I can even remember all that trivia when I get the opportunity to strut my stuff. Damned memory damage. . . When my questioning launches a quest to yaddah the blah, even Wonder Woman clears the air space to give my crusader cape plenty of snap room.
It is a good quality when I use it well. My talent for finding the right question is a valuable asset in design and research projects.
Not so much when I use questioning/questing as an evasion tool. There I can use questions to avoid an unpleasant task indefinitely.
The domestic drama at the Urban Homestead seems to be still escalating. My supercape is refusing to stay in the suitcase. I didn't even know I packed it, but. . . Such is the nature of psycho-baggage. No matter how hard I work to leave it behind, it still pops out at the least convenient of moments. This morning it has me ready to make the 20 hour drive to the homestead in a single push. Gots people to fix, drama to direct and fan clubs to impress. Psychotherapy echoes are encouraging me to do the opposite and . . . As one of my support group sponsors put it, "On your mark! Get set! SIT!"
Thoughts? Reality checks?
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Welcome to the Perseid meteor showers, the "biggies" usually every year. (The Leonids beat 'em one year IMHO).AND today much of the northern hemisphere will see 5 to 99% solar eclipse. How cool is that? Your best bet is to be in the UK or norhtern Spain, where totality is excellent before sundown. Me, I'll get a super duper tiny itty bitty slice of it, so little that it won't be noticeable. New...
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... observed a solar eclipse.
My own, has me deep in memories of "verbal vomit". It was nothing for my mother to call me and talk "at" me for 3-4-5 hours at a stretch. She always feel better afterwards (clearing the air, it's bad to keep things bottled up, etc). So bottle rockets were launched at my soul. (See she gave birth to a perfect daughter. Perfect hair. So smart. So intelligent. So kind. I just never used it well. I cut my hair wrong. Said the wrong things. Wasted my intelligence. When I was 3, I made her feel like she wasn't needed as a mother,..) So...I must have Aspergers. (Oh and my son was the same way. She made my sister buy a book on Autism and send it to her. Discussions on the two of us occupied hours of conversations with my sister.
(At this point, my sister wasn't buying it anymore. But for the first 30 years of my life...yeah, my sister fed into it. Agreeing with my mother was the easiest way to deflect the conversation off of herself.
The pain I felt towards my 5 years older sister was tremendous, but now that I have my own kids, I see how my sister was just a victim too...
Breaking free from those habits/ ties/ patterns....how do you put it so often arfie...a snotty knot.
It's ALWAYS more complicated than it seems. Quite frankly, humans just don't put up with such misery if there was an easy way out.
(((((Hugs to you, your son, and all of your family))))
not that that's what YOU are doing ... that was only my light bulb moment.
this has got to be very difficult for you right now, (((arf))). probably every single tool in your tool box is jumping out to try to help you get ready for whatever you might need to deal with.
sometimes the tools that seem like problems are back ups to give us strength; maybe your cape is secretly extra strength right now? gentle hugs
I hope there's a way you can either de-escalate the domestic drama you mention now or find an exit strategy if you can't, arfie.