That premise is key, I agree, when you wrote: "I treat obsessive thinking like an addiction." It comes with my PTSD to be reminded of my trauma for the rest of my life. But I have to do it for healing, not make it an obsession that retraumatizes me by myself over and over again.

That's where those tools from Alanon you mentioned in another post are pertinent, I think. They may seem irrelevant, but they are tools for coping with PTSD, too, imho.

I am mildly surprised you did not recognize the content from today's "Courage to Change" reader, Muji. Liberally sprinkled with other sources, of course Yes, many Al-anon members are now officially diagnosed with PTSD. Some of them are even using drug therapy. All of the latest greatest therapies are compatible with the older Al-anon support program.

Thank you, Muji. Strong reminder.

"It works if you work it and you are worth it."
Obsessive thinking is not "working it."

I try not to obsess.... I break it by doing my WHat If exercises.... OK, I am obsessing X. So what if.... X does 1 b c d e.... then I fill in the blank.... It helps me break the circular thinking, if that makes sense....

I love that AlAnon keeps being useful...

It works as long as we work, as it was said to me.

Menwhile, it's sooo had to break that cycle when stuck between Rocks and Hard Places. My HMO nearly dealt me the tailspinner today but I cried instead. Now no longer obsessing, just trying to accept that they don't care about health maintenance, only their organization.... roll with it and see where paths lead....

Blexsings of peace to you, Arfie, I'd be living in a hotel in Tahiti in your situation.... Absence doesn't make my heart grow fonder but it sure does gibe the rest of me a break!

I'm so sorry, Arfie. I have been following along, and "liked" your two wing analogy, despite how awful a situation is so poetically described.

I wish you peace, health, and strength, and that at least one of the generations (before you or after you) would get its s*** together so you can HAVE more peace, health, AND strength.

In my personal being, obsessing is clearly an addiction. I have tracked my own physical reactions in my obsessive state and have grown convinced I am physically addicted to whatever chemical mix is triggered by the high-speed thought processes of my obsessing.

Whatever that body of whatevers, I am working the steps and holding my own. Spent some time with the hives we are establishing in Washington on the Brazos, catching a different kind of buzz. Reaching to "Let go and let God." "Progress over perfection."

Thanks for the support, everyone. It truly does help.

Wrote a new diddy for the ladies. One of the hives seems to be turning aggressive and the diddy seemed to calm them. Inspired by Rudyard Kipling's "Bee Boy Song."

Gonna tell the bees everything
Gonna give them all the buzz
Of all the human stings
Gonna ask them to forgive us, please
And bless us with your honey, anyway

for me, obsessing is a part of how I dissociate, or how badly I want to perfectly resolve something. It takes great effort to bring myself to the present moment, ground myself and get centered.

Glad you're mildly surprised I didn't recognize that quote from "Courage to Change" because I take that as a compliment, arfie! I don't recall my Alanon training with precision any more, but you bring back the principles freshly, and you apply them to this DS PTSD context so well. It's a really masterful act of translation, arfie.

Yes, absolutely: obsession is not working it. Words to live by.

............." So work it!! " ........."You're worth it." ... I've been going to on and off 12-Step Meetings since 1992. Al-anon its been many year ago.

I have problems with...well...
... I have had battles with a 7-year old alter at times.
She basically has said horrible things to me in my head, over and over and over. She's been trying to get me to kill myself for most of my life, really. She thinks if she gets me to bump myself off, she can take over. Not very logical, but she's 7, so...
Anyway...
When she starts her stuff, I start chanting OM. I just keep interrupting her with OM, OM, OM, not letting her finish those cruel little sentences.
When she stops, I tell her I love her, but that I'm not going to off myself like she wants.
This has gotten her to stomp off to some sort of bedroom in my head, shout "I HATE YOU!" and slam the door.
(The kiddo has actually mellowed a lot now, is happier.)

Hope that gives you something you can use? Not the alter part, the OM. When the obsessive thoughts crank up, chanting OM to interrupt them. Loudly if by yourself.

Arfie- I *SO* identified with your chemical observation.

I, too, am an adrenaline junkie. It's what raised me. Never knew when it was going to hit the fan, so it's what I subconsciously seek out because it's familiar, even if harmful.

Many hugs and prayers beaming out to you.