Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group

Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.

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My story

sunandbutterflies
sunandbutterflies

Hello,


I have been watching other people on here for a while. Figured that it might be a good time to share my story. A few years ago, I was sexually assualted by a family member. We had been in the same place hundreds of times before. His wife was home and has no knowledge of what happened. I can still feel the weight of his body pressed against me, his arms holding me, and the sound of his heart rate increasing with his arousal. Some days, I have wakened with those images fresh in my mind and it takes me time to reorient that it was just a dream. The smell of Old Spice cologne gives me flashbacks. Sometimes, being around men of similar build scares me too. Sometimes, random things like songs give me flashbacks too. I spent months not being able to sleep well Sometimes, I still have a hard time falling asleep or staying asleep. Speaking with a counselor certainly helped, but there are still some days where I feel like I can hardly breathe. 

Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
Welcome to the board sunandbutterflies ….

I am so sorry to read what you went through however I am glad that you've found us...

This is a good place to come.... Gentle hug......xo
Community Leadermujicaptsd
mujicaptsd
sunandbutterflies, welcome from me, too. I was molested repeatedly as a kid in my own home, and my parents had no clue. It's more terrifying that way, isn't it?

Sometimes I think that if it had been a stranger in a strange place like the subway, it wouldn't have taken my sense of safety away quite as much. But for it to be someone I knew who was invited into my home shattered my sense of safety in a different way. He was a pedophile, and he went on to assault 4 other kids from my elementary school, too. In 2009 we got the news he'd been murdered in prison by a fellow inmate and finally decades later I felt a little safer.

Certain stimuli still cause me to clench my body up. You mentioned the smell of Old Spice. With me, when my PTSD gets triggered hard, I lose all sense of smell temporarily. I don't know why, but my doctor says the sense of smell is the most connected to memory. So it's like my memory is refusing.

There's a great website by therapist Pete Walker with all kinds of info for folks like us, if you want to learn more about PTSD. http://pete-walker.com/fAQsComplexPTSD.html
SimpsonsOK
SimpsonsOK
Welcome aboard this DS lifeboat S&B. I also read a lot of posts and replies before jumping in. I actually found the ones where people shared tools that were helping them really helpful to build a bigger toolbox. The FBs and other ongoing reactions are what they are. Been a while since I have had FBs, but the startle reflex, the hypervigilance, and intense panic are still there. Life does become more manageable. Welcoming hugs.
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