Muji, interesting she taped a note versus using the cyber space she pushed for. All you can do is either let it pass, or respond with a reminder of the surgeon's note. Oh, or respond to the note with a pic of it and your response in a private e-mail to her. Let's a record exist without making it public. Sounds like she has problems with tracking what is going on; just can't remember the details. She sounds a bit mean spirited and those people can be dangerous. Many have read M. Scott Peck's, The Road Less Travelled; fewer have read his second, People of the Lie. Hugs as your journey to retirement continues.

SimpsonsOK, thanks for the reminder re People of the Lie. I read that, too, when it came out. Sounds like a refresher read is in order, and I do very much appreciate being directed back to it in regard to all this going on right now.

Typed note in a sealed envelope? Or typed note open so that anyone passing could read it? HIPPA?

Re Peck:

Stage 6: Where you no longer label people who don't share your own particular beliefs as somehow less than?

Good point, patti. It was in a sealed envelope, thankfully.

About M. Scott Peck and beliefs and labels, what you say here sent me to a good Psychology Today interview with M. Scott Peck about wrestling with God.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/200211/m-scott-peck-wrestling-god

I got a kick out of how it ends with him responding to the problem of hypocrisy:
"You can tell [the cynics] that if by some chance I am a saint, I'm one who smokes and drinks. I'm somebody who
often, like so many people, preaches what he needs to learn."

Wow, is that ever true of me, too! Not that I smoke and drink, but that I preach and teach what I need to learn. That learning curve, heck, it's why I come here every day.

Thanks to you, patti, and to SimpsonsOK for pointing me in that direction. I ordered another copy of M. Scott Peck's People of the Lie book on Amazon now so I can re-read it. It's the right frame of reference for the turbulence going on with my bosses now as they sense I'm pulling away from them toward retirement in Mexico now. Adapting to change is hard for us all, including me and also including them.

I didn't know iPhone photography was a real thing until this year. I always had cheapy prepaid androids. I bought an iPhone a few months ago and have been experimenting with photography and editing images. If this old(ish) dog can learn new tricks, anyone can at any age.

I didn't know it was, either, soulsearcher. I do think I've heard of films actually being made with iPhones, though--films. Pretty cool.

Patti, I'm sorry you're offended as an atheist, but I had no idea because my very best friend offline is an atheist and he's not offended by the same things. We talk about atheist stuff all the time, like this past weekend when we went on a road trip to the National Book Festival at the Library of Congress. Like when he goes to church just for me and listens to me preach, atheist that he is, because that's our friendship. It must vary, then, maybe? Like it does with theists? I don't know.

Of course you're not evil. And nor am I. I don't mind your saying M. Scott Peck is immature. He's not me, and I wasn't who brought him up originally anyway, so I'm not even accountable for his mention here, much less for him anywhere else. Me, I wrote my own book. I'll let you know its title if you want to private message me for it. It got good reviews. It's pertinent to DS PTSD because it devotes a chapter to the torture teacher overseas whose student got ahold of me and tortured me on Dec. 8, 1973 when I was 15, which to return to the topic is why I'm here asking for support today for PTSD.

So please, please forgive me if I say I didn't start this thread to discuss your atheism, important as it is, and it is important. It's just that I'm in a PTSD crisis here. The Rules of the Road on Daily Strength are there so I can ask for help through all of our differences. It's hard for me to focus, PTSD triggered as I am. Going back to when I started the thread, I had surgery pain and at issue at work going on at once and I asked for support.

Coming back to that topic where it now stands, I have an appointment coming up tomorrow to return to that surgeon, and it's triggering for me with my PTSD today. What I'm doing about it is that I'm going to see my psychiatrist for support today for meeting my surgeon tomorrow. Difficulties at work continue. I just had more at the end of the day yesterday. Going back to work is daunting right now.

Returning this thread I started to its original intention, support welcome for the challenge of follow up to my surgery while seeking a constructive path forward at work. Thanks, y'all. Gotta run. Off I go. Gulp.

I hope that your appt to the pdoc helps you to deal with the anxiety Muji and that your return to the surgeon goes well tomorrow

Deep breaths..... Big hug.....xo

Deep breaths indeed, SC. After teaching my morning classes, I always have an office hour for students. But a week of post-op oral surgery pain and boss pressure got to me today. I had an appointment scheduled for 1:15pm with my psychiatrist, but I decided to see if he could see me sooner, like at 11:15am instead. I hung a sign on my community college's office door and told them I'd have office at 1pm instead of at 11am today.

At my psychiatrist's office I was well received though hours earlier than my appointment. I guess it pays to be a punctual patient after a few years. Lucky for me, he did indeed take me in at 11:15am for a session and so my Prazosin prescription could be renewed. Since stage 4 kidney disease got me, as Prazosin's processed by the liver it's the only PTSD med I'm allowed any more. So I'm grateful for that much.

At my psychiatrist's office the question of why stress has built up for me so much this month got an answer. Tomorrow's return follow up post-op appointment with my oral surgeon will be the EIGHTH doctor's visit this month for me. Being poked and prodded twice a week is a lot for me with my PTSD triggers.

I live alone because my PTSD startle response is too high for me to have a roommate. If anybody walks behind me, I jump--and that's not even if they touch me. So being poked and prodded twice a week has really amped my PTSD up high.

The appointments have involved extra poking and prodding this month, too. Besides the oral surgery on 3 broken root canals, removing abscessed tooth roots and doing a bone graft, there was a really invasive ultrasound procedure done on me.

The ultrasound involved manipulating the lower regions of my body from different angles, something that triggered my PTSD concerning having been sexually assaulted as a kid by a pedophile. I was unprepared for it, too, as it came as a surprise to me in one of my doctor visits.

After that visit, the next few doctor's visits seemed to amp my PTSD up even more. After more triggering visits twice a week without a break I was driven to such a triggered state that I'm surprised I was able to function without biting anybody's head off from stress, That's why having stress from my boss at this particular time was tougher than usual for me.

After my early psychiatrist's session today, though, I decided to do like SC and my psychiatrist said and take deep breaths when I got back to work. It was a frustrating day. I found out my community college bookstore ordered the wrong book for 3 classes I'm currently teaching. Still, after work I hung around the water cooler at work, and doing that made me available to have a collegial coworker chat with my boss.

As someone with PTSD I'm more skilled at the intense talks about trauma than I am skilled in light banter about the weather. But I'm proud to say I did it today, though, with my boss around the water cooler at work. We talked about nothing for the better part of an hour!

I know it didn't resolve everything and it didn't clear the air, but for me it was a breakthrough that relieved some of this stressful workplace anxiety I've been caught up in for the last month. Thanks to everybody who has carried me for the last 30 days, I'm really grateful. Now, tomorrow on to that one more doctor's appointment to follow up with my oral surgeon....

I hope you're healing well Muji!

Thanks, Doo. I'm up and at 'em early getting ready to go see the oral surgeon now.... Fingers crossed.

Hope you got through your appointment ok,muji.

Thinking of you.

Hey Muji, you have definitely been on overload with the return to school and all these medical/dental procedures. Hoping you will now have a break from them. Good luck with the implant. Actually the easiest part of the process. The worst is over. Calming, supportive and comforting hugs.

I know, SimpsonsOK. It's been a week! The worst is over though, as you say, right? That's what I'm counting on. On Sunday I speak at a church, and I'm hoping to do a good job and get a boost in my week's end from it.