Oh goodness weddings.. My sister just got married in June. That bridal party was hell to deal with. Have you ever seen the movie Bridesmaids? Its worth a watch. Funny.

Maybe you can find a medium amount of socialization. A mid level so you arent overcome with isolation but arent completely overwhelmed with wedding stuff.

What wedding movies I have endured have been forgotten. Definitely not my genre. They all bleed together in my recall.

I like the idea of the medium amount of socialization.

Is it possible to do bridal and baby showers without going macho chick? I went to one bridal shower where the brought in a male stripper. I didn't think imitating men at their worst was an improvement on the theme.

Kinda wanna stick to just passing on the Mrs-ery all together. It was easy with me elders and peers. It feels harder with youngers.

It's a date, Jen. I need some open dialogue about this empowered Barbie phenomenon.

arfie, I feel your pain. As a guy, I get a pass on showers. As for weddings, I do my best to be happy for the couple. But the social setting gets wearing after a while. All I can say is pace yourself, my friend.

i have been at one baby shower and over there you dont need to be any macho chick, i didnt even know that family, i went with my friend

they did something like small play if i can say it that way with the ribbon and point was who will get the closest meassure how big is the stomach of the pregnant one, me and friend were there maybe for half hour and when you go they gave you some small gift thanking you to be there

i had a chance to watch so many weddings, which were outside between building which had small park, some of them were nice and on some of them were terrible for me because of music they played during the ceremony

im not much social person either, just be yourself and stay for a bit and if it is too much for you apologize and leave

dont isolate, it is enough to show up and be there as you can, and im happy for these events in your life, i dont like much barbies either, but you know it can be interesting to see how young ppl do it now rather than to be concerned about it, actualy you might get maybe some fun there, you never now

you will make it

I happen to be watching a Law and Order episode about transgender men. Can women be transgender? Maybe if I declare myself a man trapped in a woman's body, I can skip the showers, etc., and still be supportive of the events.

I have seriously wondered about the trans-gender thing. I feel seriously out of place among only females and couldn't care less about hair dye, belly measurements, shopping, etc.

Love babies, though. Kids, too. Too bad they grow up.

arfie, sorry

woman can be transgender if she has male organs, declaration isnt enough for transgender

i tried to cheer you up about upcoming events, do it as you can

Arfie- I can understand. While my female cousins and very few female friends were checking out bridesmaids gowns or baby furniture, I was whitewater kayaking, fishing, hunting, and hanging out with the guys. I managed to avoid being in any bridal party ever. Have been to a wedding or two but the last one was in 2004 in Texas. After flying thousands of miles, I got the flu and barely made it to the wedding and reception.
I am married but it was a very small wedding without much fanfare. In fact we skipped getting a church. Got married at the Glen Onoko access on the Lehigh River (my river trips often ended here), We paid for the wedding ourselves.

I'm with you and Jen- rather go get a cup of coffee and discuss what is wrong with kids growing up today.

Arfie,
Sure you can be a transgender male w/out surgery - look at all the current legal cases about who gets to use what restroom.

But am thinking there are milder dodges. The perfect last minute cancellation excuse is diarrhea. :-) No one wants to hear details.

Right now am trying to accept a God parenting request, but apparently I may need to convert to pull it off. funny world we live in.

Say you got PMS and don't want to wreck the vibe of the party... Yes I know the biological probability (look at my age too), but that's why it would work. People won't question you though they might wonder if you were that gal in the Ntnl. Inquirer...

Seriously, showers, Avon, Arbonne, you name it. Don't invite me unless it includes tattoos, vitamin supplements or fitness equipment. Other than that, not interested.

I understand the out of place feeling. Memories of my past get in the way of having fun. I seem to take words very literally, not in a niave way, more sarcastic. My eyes are always watching for emotional attitudes. Grandma's old saying, "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" keeps me pretty quiet. I find if I carry a loaded camera, it immediately becomes my protection. There are so many that hate having there picture taken, they will move out of sight to get away. The others that like to be in each shot, tend to make it in a lot. Either way verbal contact is cut off when I start aiming the lens. I find some one I don't mind chatting with, pulling up a few of the funnier gotcha's seems to break the ice of conversation. There are always a few throw aways that Are fun to talk about. My simple gift is usually a nice card and a bottle of good wine, or sparkling juice to recipient with a note of forthcoming CD. Pretty much universal for all occassions, even if there is a hired photographer, because they always get the cute shots, not the roll of funny outtakes I will include. My evil fun.