Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
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I can not believe the experience I had on the job. I work in a emergency room as a health unit corrinator (clerk).
A patient was brought in by ambulance who had been raped. I was sitting at the desk and the staff doc and residents were on the other side of the room. A object was used on the women. The staff doc was making a joke about it to the residents......
I went over an tapped his shoulder. I said the patient is standing at the desk on the other side of the wall.
I went back to my chair to gather my thoughts. and to role play how I was going to handle this situation.
I asked him I wanted to talk with him alone. I said what he said was totally inapropriate and you never know what staff here is a survivor.
He apologize and admitted that was wrong. he was glad I brought this to his attention.......
I was so pissed off and I felt violated. I went up to talk to the supervisor. I said what I need to do is vent. I vented for an hour. I needed to talk to someone....I was not going home to be by myself. She was very supportive and apalled that this happen. She was proud that I confronted him.
What really makes me angry to experience feelings and stirs the old stuff up. I felt mind raped. My stomach is upset. I don't want to go through all this crap.
I have no respect for that doc. And everytime I run into him I will look him straight into his eye. I refuse to be a victim over this......
I dislike feeling bad. That life in not freaken fair. the feelings just swirl around.
One thing I do know I will not pick up a drink or smoke a cigarette....... I just want to ring his neck. I feel like a kid here and wanting to stamp my feet......geeeeeeezus martha.........
I have a full plate right now. I am having surgery done on my ear on monday. Dealing with ptsd with that.
I am running out of steam here........
A patient was brought in by ambulance who had been raped. I was sitting at the desk and the staff doc and residents were on the other side of the room. A object was used on the women. The staff doc was making a joke about it to the residents......
I went over an tapped his shoulder. I said the patient is standing at the desk on the other side of the wall.
I went back to my chair to gather my thoughts. and to role play how I was going to handle this situation.
I asked him I wanted to talk with him alone. I said what he said was totally inapropriate and you never know what staff here is a survivor.
He apologize and admitted that was wrong. he was glad I brought this to his attention.......
I was so pissed off and I felt violated. I went up to talk to the supervisor. I said what I need to do is vent. I vented for an hour. I needed to talk to someone....I was not going home to be by myself. She was very supportive and apalled that this happen. She was proud that I confronted him.
What really makes me angry to experience feelings and stirs the old stuff up. I felt mind raped. My stomach is upset. I don't want to go through all this crap.
I have no respect for that doc. And everytime I run into him I will look him straight into his eye. I refuse to be a victim over this......
I dislike feeling bad. That life in not freaken fair. the feelings just swirl around.
One thing I do know I will not pick up a drink or smoke a cigarette....... I just want to ring his neck. I feel like a kid here and wanting to stamp my feet......geeeeeeezus martha.........
I have a full plate right now. I am having surgery done on my ear on monday. Dealing with ptsd with that.
I am running out of steam here........
That is completely and totally UNPROFESSIONAL of that doctor!
I am soooo proud of you for standing up to him! I know so many doctors have the attitude that they can do no wrong.
Don't let what that jerk did derail you....
(((HUGS)))
Prayers go out to you for some peace of mind now and for a smooth surgery.
Take care!
Wakinyantechate
I would go a step further and write a letter to the hospital director anyone that wants to hear it, i hope he gets fired.
One would like to believe (I think) that especially those within such positions of power and authority, whom we would like to hold to high esteem and regard, would behave as "bigger people," under such circumstance...and that they might, more than anyone, rise above this call for human regard and decency.
Something that Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote in one of his essays about "a boy who is sure of his dinner," had occurred to me immediately after reading this. Regretfully, "most" males will never know what it is like (unless they are gang-raped with a broomstick!)...and therefore may never be capable of compassion. Or those (of this mentality), who are sure that their wealth and status will safeguard them always to ever being in position where a profound and damaging violation such as this might occur.
If it's any consolation, I have indeed met many doctors who are extremely dignified and would never display such profound disregard; although I am acquainted with one who has (as well). I also worked with some lawyers who defended rapists and who actually claimed that rape was a good thing! How twisted is that?!
I hope you are okay and that your surgery goes well.
I am so sorry you experienced this. It truly brought tears to my eyes.
One of the things that people who work in places where you face a lot of different traumas do is develop something called gallows humor. Things that sound horrible to someone else, get talked about in unconventional ways as a way to release the stress of dealing with so much trauma day in and day out. It is not supposed to "funny" but a way to release the stress. The biggest thing is that it has to be handled away from a place that would hurt anyone.
I worked for a large police department and police officers there had to constantly be re-evaluated to ensure that they are emotionally fit to do their jobs. This type of behavior/reaction can be detrimental. I would expect this response from a teenage boy or a thug...not a physician!
The fairest response to the physician's behavior would be an evaluation. Maybe he can't handle it?
Good Luck.
Ivan
Yes I am working at trying not to let it eat me up. I feel like a mack truck hit me emotionally.
I do feel wounded and very vulnerable. I want to just hang close to home. And eat comfort food.
What is interesting working in the er. Is where I have done alot of my healing over the years. I knew when I walked thru those doors 21 yrs ago. That my spirituality was'nt left at the door. Thats part of me came with me. A person just can't be half will. I always will be a advocate for the patient. And yes I do work with some staff that are insensitive and a jaded. I choose not to hang around them.
I have 3 days left working. I will be out on medical leave for acouple of weeks. Which will be a blessing.
Question...
How often, in the workplace, do we observe "genuine" sensitivity versus obligation to act or behave sensitive (for instance, because one is under scrutiny by his/ger peers and/or is under reprimand)?
Do such individuals as a result of reprimand suddenly "become" more sensitive or compassionate?
Don't know about you, but I feel very "unsafe" especially when I get a glimpse of someone's knee jerk reaction in this way. Perhaps this is why the apology is/was not sufficient?
You bet he was uncomfortable with me...........Shame does eat the soul. Meaning him.
I agree what you had to say hypother. My way of doing things is to write a letter. I may send it.
thank you
But I understand the whole PTSD reaction thing. When people trigger you & your response is escalated by your past trauma's it's hard to stay grounded & keep it in perspective. It's not like the guy maliciously set out to attack you personally ~ he was just being ignorant and very untactful. And everyone deals with things in their own way. It could be that making light of the stuff that comes through the ER makes it easier to deal with - who knows why he would make a comment like that.
It sounds like you are being strong and remaining professional about it. But don't let it eat you up. It was just a comment & you already took action and brought it to his attention that it was inappropriate. Now you have to focus on how you deal with it emotionally and work on letting it go. We're all human & we all make mistakes. If the Dr. has some issues - they are his issues and they don't need to become your issues.
Sorry you had to deal with this stuff at work - that's tough. Good for you for dealing with it so well!
I couldn't confront the guy... I was so taken aback and sick inside from what he said and did that I went into defense mode and pretended it didn't happen. Then was up all night crying. It took me two days before I could report him by email. What happened? I got reprimanded by my supervisor for not putting a stop to it immediately when it happened.... But within a month he was fired and the perpetrator (who was given another chance) was transferred and demoted.
Those who have never experienced such a trauma have no idea what effect joking about it can have on someone who has. You have my sincere praise and gratitude for responding to that doctor. Maybe some of your courage will rub off on me!