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Memory vs. Flashback

arfie
arfie

I kinda wish there was a question emoticon for the "mood" selections. My emotional states mix allot and I am not always sure how to define the mood I am in when I post one of my psycho snot knots. . . Guess I'll go with the "Good" emoticon. I am fine. How are you?


December is pretty much one, long trauma anniversary month for me. Somewhere in the 1980's, with considerable help from my therapy support network, I declared December to be my Official Therapy Month. What a long strange trip that has been, but I believe the gain may have been worth the pain. I seem to be holding steady through a spoil the GKs rotten Christmas. I type now in the "Christmas Room" contemplating the difference between a memory and a flashback. The trauma memories are still there and as unpleasant as ever, but they have not been spoiling the Spoil the Grandkids Show. The Christmas Room seems to be a major hit with the GKs. They didn't even turn on their e-toys until bed time yesterday.


Is intensity the difference between a memory and a flashback? Desirability? Something beyond contemporary vocabulary?


Thoughts? Reality checks? Happy Ho Ho's?

Kate1976
Kate1976
I don’t know. For me, a memory doesn’t have the pull of a flashback. I can control it and my emotions better. In a flashback I feel like I fall into the memory and relive the emotions, especially fear. My therapist uses a train analogy. For a memory I watch things go by. For a flashback, I hop on the train and have trouble getting off. Hugs Arfie!
arfie
arfie
I love the train analogy, Kate. I have frequently compared my flashbacks to discovering that the proverbial light at the end of the proverbial tunnel is really a psycho freight train coming at me.

Would that make a regular memory a brick in the tunnel wall?

Or am I lost in metaphor again?
Kate1976
Kate1976
That’s a good thought! I try to stay off the train and focus on staying present. Hugs Arfie
invisablefriend
invisablefriend
Not sure about the Flashbacks but there’s Happy Memories being made in your Christmas Room and spoil the GKs rotten Christmas.
arfie
arfie
There are indeed Happy Memories being made. We just got in from the fire pit behind the honey barn which holds the Christmas Room. Around the fire, Hubs suggested we let the GKs open their presents tonight.

"Nah," I sneered. "I'm having too much fun torturing them with the suspense."

To me, it feels kinda like a barn warming party. The barn was still obviously a dairy barn beneath the 50 years of neglect when I started cleaning and remodeling in 2016. It's a pretty good little feather in my cap to have it spiffy enough to party in. Any excuse will due.
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