I went to my vehicle and saw this shmeer on my window it made me have a flashback and feel everything I never felt before. My ex psycho husband when I left him finally was stalking me everywhere I went. He stalked me at the womens shelter,friends houses etc. So I had a male friend that turned into love,but he was doing drugs and thats a nono for me. H helped me move into transitional housing and got me a gun so I would feel safe. Me and him were the only people that knew where it was and he knew that my ex was always putting swastica all over things. So I broke up with him because of the drugs. One day I started feeling weird and wired and I could not figure out what was going on. I had been drinking coca cola with a friend who was trying to quit Meth and I was helping her. All the sudden I am feeling like I am going crazy so someone took me for a ride, when I got home there were swastica fingerprints on the mirrrors and the gun with the bullets were on the bed. I was freaking out he had found me again. Somehow he had found out I was having a hard time and he snuck in the back window of the housing to help me,save me, comfort me. I was reliving the rapes that had occurred by my ex husband. He sold me for three days..long story. I did not want to be touched I told him that and he wanted to make love and I told him that I couldnt I was reliving it and he raped me..... I found out later that he had given my friend meth for her and for her to dose me. He had put the swasticas and the gun out so that I would need him again.......... So right now I am feeling the rape........Fucking sucks. My man came home for lunch and I told him I had a flashback starting to cry and he said he did not want to know, did not even give me a hug. I ignored him the rest of the time because I did not want to break down in tears because he had hurt me by not caring enough to atleast hold me. Right now I am thinking about leaving for the night I dont know if I can stand to be around him. I listen to all his crap and hold him.ask how he is doing is there anything I can do to make him feel better. I am torn at leaving maybe he wont want me back........Help me.