i have the day where im fine.ITs alwys in the back of my head no matter what i do i try ot ingore it happened but that gets me nwhere it just sets me back even onger and harder next time.My mother hasnt been supportive throuh the whole ordeal, i had noone to talk to she did ok thn she kinda excepted me to be on likea time line of how to handle being raped and hitt, not only was doing things to me. But we found out that at the very same time he was molesting my 13 year old sister. He ruined alot i feel gulity still to this day i was her older sister i should have protect her a bit better. but i had no idea,i have longer i cant talk about to my mom at all and i honestly mean that she told me just yesterday i need to get over my you i havent said anything to her about it since november. she makes me feel as though its not improtant. i have noone other than conuseling i can really just say how i feel and not feel like im gonna scare em away.so i hold everything in.IM trying to do my best everyday its really hard i dont even have support for the people who i thought would have my back.my dad told me he had my back and he loved me i know he dose but my dad has a very different way of showing his emotioms, as well as my older sister thye both know and support me they understand what im going isnt going to be a cake walk. my mom just basically makes me feel like i talk about it 24/7 (i dont at all we hardly even talk anymore ) it makes me feel alone. The more i try to get better the more its brought up in my face i need to get the fuck over it. i would never i a million year say that to my daughter never i was so pissed so hurt i was in tear for hours. i think my mom is in a huge denial and she just wants to prentend this didnt happen well it did and me venting like this is one of the only ways i can find peace right now. im sorry

thnak