I think there are things you can do to try to alleviate suffering, but to put the blame on someone who is suffering by saying it's a choice seems a bit harsh, Buddhist saying or not hehe If we could all snap our fingers and not be suffering, i suspect none of us would be here! But, yes, there are things we can try and do about it for sure...

I don't believe our trauma is the gift, but what we become through it and as we heal is a gift. That we survived is a gift. That we can speak truth into each other's lives is a gift. That we can empathize with others and have compassion is a gift. That we make it through one more day is a gift. Pain helps us realize that life is the gift!

Pain is a gift and nessacery! If we felt no pain we would not know when to move our hand away from a fire. Or if mental pain was not there we would have no clue that the jerk who insulted us just tought us to recognize certain types of jerks and to aviod them. JUST A THOUGHT;)

For me, depends on when you ask me. If you ask me during a 3 day long migraine when I have actually prayed for God to just take me home, I would say no it is not a gift. It feels like a punishment. If you aske me the day after the pain has subsided I would say yes it is becasuse it got me to think of the little things I take advantage of like just being outdoors in the fresh breeze. If pain is what has kept me praying and seeking more of God, then that is the gift regardless.

It's a matter of understanding the difference between pain and suffering. Pain is a result of our original trauma. We all feel pain. It is only when we do things to avoid the pain (ie suppress our feelings, numb ourselves with drugs or alcohol, etc) that we truly suffer. Why? Because these methods of avoidance never dissipate the pain. We still have it deep within and not dealing with it only results in this pain being prolonged. It is now that people truly start suffering. Nobody is "blaming the victim" rather it is a matter of understanding the difference between pain and suffering in the context of this Buddhist saying. If your definitions of pain and suffering differ, of course this saying doesn't apply to you. But for me, once I realized that I was only making things worse for myself by not dealing with the root of the pain, and causing my own suffering, I was able to say no, I don't want to suffer any more! Don't get me wrong, I am in pain, but I minimize my suffering. I believe it is empowering to be able to say I have complete and total control over whether I suffer or not!

Saying that pain is a gift is like saying hemorrhoids are gifts, that mean people are gifts. Pain is our bodies or minds telling us that there is something wrong for which we need to find solutions or management. Accepting that pain is a gift is a dangerous thing, settling for less than what we could have or deserve.
If I accept that my pain is my gift will stop me from doing everything I can do to stop the pain. I am not satisfied to live with pain unless I have done absolutely everything I can do to get rid of it or manage it.

Really Great subject!!!! Everyone experiances pain at some piont some cronic. I believe it is a gift....There is a disorder that some exeperiance no pain whatsoever which causes them to walk around with burns or break a bone and dont even notice, so in my opinion pain a gift. true some get a really big gift.but there in lys the opportuninty for managing it which is a whole new topic.

I have experienced both pain and suffering from not having closure to complete the grieving process from trauma. This has, at the very least, been a challenging struggle. I realize the core causes and influences of the vast majority of my thoughts and e-motions, and it still doesn't change the fact(s): they are painful, and I do still suffer, but that is not all there is for me. I do distinguish a difference between pain and suffering... and as for whether it's a "gift", it is if you perceive that it is. Fact is not truth, truth you must discover for yourself...

The reason I do not personally choose to perceive pain as a gift; gift being synonymous with treasure, prize, reward, additionally please consult your thesaurus... is: If it's a "gift" you can choose whether or not to receive it. So, the practice of exalting something that simply IS, becomes a manner of shapeshifting which may cause that (thing, person, etc) to become much more powerful than it may deserve to be, or changed from it's original state, because it's being fed either individual or collective energy...

I have a friend whose relative is a professional psychic, I am often mindful not to refer to this as "a gift" because in actuality it is simply an ability. It is what it is, I don't need to label it. Just ideas, thanx for the topic, & to all who shared:)

Pain has made me a better person and taught me a lot....
Although i woud no recommend it...There's other ways to be a better person but pain does connect us in a special way......and it puts us in touch with a part of life that is there for so many in a very direct way.

Its life.And those of us who know pain are really able to help others.

Oh yeah but i wouldn't call it a "gift" per say.
And if there's a God; please don't send me those kind of 'gifts'.....

@ # 25... Yes, we are in a place where we can use what we've learned to help others and this cause needs as many warriors as will step forward. This is one sick world, society and lack of proper priorities and I hope what I say next will not trigger anyone. Abuse is alive and well and out of control as evidenced by the recent news about the woman in Sacramento, Ca. who microwaved her baby to death. I can't imagine the suffering that child went through.
@ # 26.........Empathetic chuckle, I hear what your saying.

If you think about it, a gift is something given from one to another which is intended to bring pleasure. If I were to receive a dead skunk or a live one for that matter, I would not consider it a gift. I would consider it a cruel joke.
My mother-in-law used to give me the most hideous outfits as gifts, but she meant well.
My father molested me as a child, and my sister traumatized me years later. These actions were cruel and never could be considered gifts.
Sure, I learn some valuable lessons from bad things that happen, but that is my choice and my gift to myself if you want to put it that way.

...so, all in all, the "gift" is that pain helps us have a look inside? the event itself which caused the pain, no, but the place which we discover within as a result?