it certainly wouldn't hurt to ask around. ya never can tell until you try. since your parents seem receptive to working with you, it might be worth checking with local churches and community centers for family workshops and retreats.

gentle support, whichever way you take it.

I am in the process of working with my pdoc to possibly find a therapist that works with that group. I almost think it would be wise to keep them all together so that we can easily compare notes. I don't know if that is how to put it but with as scattered as my brain has been (especially today) that is the best I can come up with. Life is still wonderful, this is just a hiccup in the road.

If you feel ready to open up and talk to someone who will help you feel better, you should visit a therapist. They can educate you to help yourself come out of those traumas and find a purpose in life!

I had ineffective therapists weekly for 12 long years, Presh, so in response to your question here I have experience to add that suggests the therapist be a PTSD specialist, if possible. After those 12 years I got one of those, and in 3 years of therapy got well enough to come here to DS PTSD and talk openly enough to give and get support.

I haven't had the best luck with therapists but I question whether or not I can figure this out on my own. I also wonder if time will help ease it. It hasn't hit in the last two days where I was facing several times a day. That makes me wonder if talking to my parents about and working through it with them is enough. I will have to give it some more time simply because I have been unable to find a therapist in my area that takes my insurance, doesn't take a referral, or doesn't take information and then refer out. I found some that deal in adolescence but that doesn't fit me lol. There are many down in the Phoenix area but that is over an hours drive. Yeah, no thanks! So it's a wait and see what happens until I can find outside help or realize I don't need it.

I'd just say from my own experience that you can trust yourself when you find the right one. I had a lot of dumb luck or, perhaps, divine intervention, in finding mine. I moved for work so I had to find another doc, and it turned out this PTSD specialist went to the same church I joined as a new member. I stumbled upon him there.

So finding him wasn't the result of any systematic search on my part, but knowing he was the right one just took care of itself. After 12 years of stalled recovery, we covered a lifetime of PTSD in 3 years. It was amazing. I told him traumas I'd hidden away from everybody, and got to the point that I can talk about them every day here with relative ease.

Muji, for the most part I am at ease with talking about things. My parents are open and understanding as well as eager to help me make it make sense. Originally I wanted to take some of the burden away from them so we don't strain what has become an awesome relationship. The more I think about obtaining a therapist and commuting the hour to go see them, the more I feel like it would be a tax on the system when I discover that I don't need it. Maybe just sharing it here and obtaining feedback will prove to be all the therapy I need?

Wow, presh, that's so great that you have open, supportive parents that listen to you make sense of trauma with you. If you feel their support and the support here is sufficient, good for you.

The only additional reason I can think of for still having a PTSD therapist is to keep up on the PTSD research going on and learning how it applies to you personally. That's why it was so great I got a therapist who was a PTSD specialist.

PTSD is an area of medical research that's changing rapidly now that the USA ended its war in Afghanistan last year and the focus now is on veterans after the war. That's how I got prescribed Prazosin for my PTSD nightmares, the only med I can take with kidney disease since it's liver processed.

I wouldn't have known about that if I didn't still have a psychiatrist who could fill me in. It's totally cured my PTSD insomnia.

You know, Muji, having a PTSD therapist to help me keep up to date on things is not a bad idea. Sometimes I find that what once worked no longer does. Having more options and more ideas may help in the continued road to healing. I will continue to look in to therapy. Thanks for the feedback! =)

Sure thing, Presh, if it's not an emergency, no sweat, but in my long term PTSD recovery having the input from an expert really helped. I wouldn't have found out about Prazosin without him, and that really conquered my long term PTSD insomnia problem.

I was on Prazosin for a long time. When the flashbacks got the best of me, I was put on it during the day as well. Granted the amount I was taking during the day was a low enough dose that it didn't interfere with my daily world. I can't call it my daily life because at that point I was merely surviving and not living. I think the thing that scares me the most about getting back into therapy is the idea of more flashbacks as I remember that which has been forgotten. I don't want to remember, I don't want to turn my amazing life in Arizona into the nightmare I faced in Utah. I want to keep the life I have and not trade it in for chaos. I know that which has been suppressed will eventually be remembered, but I don't want to add speed to that process. Who knows, it may stay forgotten and I'm okay with that.

So cool that you knew about Prazosin long ago, Presh! It was a revelation for my psychiatrist when it became available; we weren't up on things as much where I used to live.

What scares you about getting back into therapy is justified, in my own opinion based on my own experience. I think that was the wisdom behind my decision not to mention for 12 years to a regular non-PTSD specialist therapist my having survived a car bombing at 9 as a missionary kid overseas.

It's no coincidence that I DID bring it up when I finally had a therapist who was a PTSD expert. He knew how to help me with opening a can of worms and that's why in 3 years of weekly therapy we did me more good than all 12 years before with regular therapists.

Treating trauma is not the same as treating your garden variety neurosis. It helps to have a trauma specialist, so good for you for addressing your concern. So should that therapist when and if you find one.

I am actively looking for a therapist, however I'm not sure if I'll be able to find one that takes my insurance and specializes in PTSD. One can only hope at this point. A lot of what I'm facing centers around PTSD and its after affects. I will keep trying but I'll tell you what, with the price of gas I'm not looking forward to the two hour round trip drive.

Well, I have called on several therapists; one said leave a message on a full voicemail, two said they don't take insurance, one takes insurance but not at this time??????, and one I left a message for. We'll see what happens in the next little while. In the meantime I just keep doing what I'm doing and be patient.

One takes insurance but "not at this time," Presh? What the--? Wow, it's a hassle dealing with health care. I'd forgotten. Good for you for these several calls you've made.