I chant OM while driving.

Your brain does not need to ruminate, chant and shut it up.

I was thinking about something that worked for me but wouldn't he so good on the phone, but could work in the car before you get to people is fireballs they are hot and they bring your attention back pretty fast. You could find another really hot candy that is much smaller that you could put in your cheek that would not hinder your talking. if you talk with only one ear covered with those ear pieces you could put another ear bud in with a radio attached and turn it up so loud it grabs your attention and brings you back. Another thing that can help is to wear shoes that are easy to slip off and massage your foot for a minute while you are on the phone that helps to bring a lot of people back as well.another thing if things are really bad you can always go to the bathroom to pull yourself together. If you use the handicapped stall you could dance for a few moments.
I do hope one of the suggestions everyone has offered up really helps. Good luck and know we are always here to support you. Hugs

Wow, your work is stressful. There's got to be some way to strengthen your boundaries at least a bit...I mean, idk how, but maybe others have ideas here...cause you might be heading for burnout :/

My understanding of distress tolerance is that many tools make up its effectiveness. I'm trying to think back on my dbt lessons...

Breathing in a simple pattern works for me. Leo told me she does this, too. Breath in for a count of four (three, whatever is comfortable), hold for four, exhale for four, pause for four. With short practice, I breathe very comfortably and naturally this way, and can sneak this in even during interpersonal stuff.

Grounding through my feet...I think one key to distress tolerance is practicing a 'pause' before inner or outer response. Acting opposite is difficult for me, however I can think 'oppisite'. For anxiety (a biggie for me) I will think 'I'm feel excited' a few times (3+).

I feel like I'm going on here :/

Re: this board, your self-described intermittent presence is fine because this board is strong and always here for you...besides, I don't think of your participation that way. Sounds like you give and give all day long...maybe relax here? You're fine :-)

Whew, that's a tough job. I was a halfway house director for released federal felons. Stressful, non-compliant folks are tough to handle, like herding cats all day. You have my respect, definitely. Much support to you Cecil. We're with you.

When I have my down times, I feel like I am taking more than I am giving too because I am. I think you are right when you say you need to deal with your stuff. Very true for me too. Sometimes I start to read a post and just cannot finish it because I have to much going on in my own head and don't feel I am in any shape to respond to someone and their problem. I just cannot do it nor do I feel like my advise would be good sound advise. I think that is ok CecilBGreen. Like my therapist tells me all the time, "you cannot allow yourself to take on others problems because you need to fix you, you need to put yourself first."

I have some suggestions for work that might help.

- to keep in the present put an elastic band around your wrist. snapping it will bring you right back to present and the customer on the phone will not hear it either.

- keep a stress ball handy and play with it. The distraction may help you to stay in present mind and not wander off to thinking about something that causes you stress and snapping people's heads off.

- If you really, really think you could talk to your boss about your PTSD without losing your job or it changing the way he/she thinks of you and your performance, it might be worth while.

- Along this same lines, is there accommodations you could ask for such as shorter hours on the phone and filing or other paperwork for the balance of the day. what about short-term or long term?

- doodle, while on the phone doodle....it is a great stress reliever.

- put yourself in the other person's shoes. how would you want to be treated if you called in. Think about what they have going on in their life. maybe they are just like us, fed up with life kicking them in the teeth, on the edge about to have a break down and not handling it well.. 1 in 5 will experience some kind of mental health problem in their life time. That is a lot of people with issues and the vast majority never seek help. These are your angry, yellers and grumpy people. Think about your bad days and how awful you feel and recognize many of the people you are talking to likely feel like you do on your bad days. It is not an excuse for their behavior but it may help you to understand it is not personal and the empathy may help you to not want to snap at them. (this is an opposite action by the way) Be nice when you feel like snapping at someone.

- Put up pictures at work of things you enjoy or like. that way when you get an ignorant customer on the phone you can look at the pictures and think, this is not person, go ahead and rant, I am going to my happy place. Pictures can trigger positive and good memories making it easier to cope at difficult times.

- write out some positive notes to yourself and keep them at your desk to remind you, you are great and doing well.

- prepare yourself for work. say out loud that you are going to have a good day at work. you are going to handle all the calls professionally and with skill. you are going to practice and use the tools you have learned to make your day the best it can be. Say this over and over until you believe it. This is really important, the mind is a powerful thing. If you believe it will be a good day, it will be.

hope something helps from this list.

((hugs))

Your job sounds incredibly draining.

I, for one, have no problem filling your tank when you are on empty...you don't have to give back.

...not sure where the nozzle goes, though...that could be painful.

There are some wonderful suggestions for work here, so I will leave that part be.

The part I want to address is the very first paragraph. This is a support group, Cecil. Every single time you turn up asking for help, you ARE helping the rest of us. The ability to give help is therapeutic beyond measure. Thank you for allowing for that. Please ask freely and know it serves us at least as much as it serves (I pray) you.

Okay, okay... Can't resist. No, putting people on hold is not a good idea, but how are they gonna know you are dancing or wearing a clown nose while you are on the phone? I had clients chase me down long after I closed down my business BECAUSE I did stuff like that to help with the load balancing. Load balancing is important in my personal psych management.

Cecil, arfie wrote: "Every single time you turn up asking for help, you ARE helping the rest of us." Amen to that. If you didn't ask for help, how could we?