I'm extremely sorry you feel the way you do, but if I had read this correctly, you're talking about another person owning your body? Nobody owns your body, nobody has control over another. Everyone has their own minds, their own unique thoughts and ideologies, morals and beliefs. This ties in with what you choose to do with your body. Your body is yours, not his. There's no asking him with what you can do with yourself, because you may do whatever you choose to. You are you. You are not him. He can do what he wants with himself. Though, he cannot choose what to do with you. I hope this helps you. I'm absolutely sure that you're a very beautiful person, regardless of your size or the lack of. Please do yourself a favor and have a good day, I know you deserve it.

- Aydin

How about some affirmations about how your body belongs to you? It doesn't belong to him and never did. He was a thief, a rapist and a criminal. Your body belongs to you no matter what size you are. It was never his to abuse!

Its sad but i dont want to do affirmations. I want to loose weight and nothing anyone will say will stop me right now.

Do you have a therapist? A lot of what you post about lately i really think one could be a big help to you. Theres a lot of good ones out there!

I have a cpn ( psych nurse) who is acting as bit of a therapist for me) i cant get in with a nhs therapist here in england and i cant afford private one.

Nope, nope, nope....younger isn't better.

You know I care.

You really need to talk to a professional about whats going on, i say this because i care, i been there too i have struggled with purging after eating since 14 years old. You need help, and with the other things you've posted lately. There is only so much people can do to help online but someone in person can help you so much more! Have you checked into DBT Therapy?

Doing affirmations doesn't mean you can't lose weight. It's not either or. You'd just be affirming the truth.

my beautiful friend - wrapping you in supportive hugs. Whatever you need i’m here ((((((lovelil))))))

I hear you. That makes sense why you would want to be underweight. I honestly want that right now too, but I have no idea why. I'm so sorry you are feeling gross. You are not gross though. And nobody owns you or your body! Ever! I wish there was more I could do to help.

Thanks everyone.

peeks our of the corner, trying to catch up on what I missed while I was on the road yesterday.

Crawls over with an apple

I know it can be hard to feel comfortable in your own skin.I am glad that you have been working with a psych nurse. It may also be beneficial to work with a physician or a licensed therapist. Best wishes to you.