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Remember when I said I was running away -- far, FAR away ??
On Thursday, I bought the plane ticket -- one way to Guatemala.
3/23/2013.
Here's the logistics for the first destination:
"Figure 6 hours from Guatemala City to Huehuetenango, we may stay the night there. Next day, 8 hrs. to Barillas. Following day, 4 hours to Maya Jaguar."
"Maya Jaguar" is off the map, and off the grid. It's nowhere, really, but insanely beautiful and simple.
I believe that qualifies as "far, FAR away," no ? ;-)
"Maya Jaguar" is the village adopted by these people:
http://adoptavillage.com/
The president of that charity (along with my cousin) is who's going with me. I met this lady in the early 90's, and traveled once, to Guatemala, with her. Never got to the village, though.
From there ... who knows where. We'll be playing it totally by ear and by map.
On Friday, I end my California trip, and head back to the Rockies to prepare for my journey.
I've started a blog ... which ... gives truth to who I am, just a little bit, but .... sometimes the truth shall set you free ;-)
http://nbeener.blogspot.com/
I won't be gone until I'm gone, but ... then ... can't be sure how much internet access I'll have, or how often.
I was already medically disabled when MY multi-year traumas hit.
Those events made the medical profoundly worse, and added the C-PTSD to the laundry list of challenges I must navigate.
This trip ... is my Hail Mary Pass.
It may not work, but -- since there IS NO backup plan -- I have to try.
"Mixed emotions" doesn't begin to describe it, but ... onward.
So ... for today ... as always ... I wish you all peace, health, and strength.
On Thursday, I bought the plane ticket -- one way to Guatemala.
3/23/2013.
Here's the logistics for the first destination:
"Figure 6 hours from Guatemala City to Huehuetenango, we may stay the night there. Next day, 8 hrs. to Barillas. Following day, 4 hours to Maya Jaguar."
"Maya Jaguar" is off the map, and off the grid. It's nowhere, really, but insanely beautiful and simple.
I believe that qualifies as "far, FAR away," no ? ;-)
"Maya Jaguar" is the village adopted by these people:
http://adoptavillage.com/
The president of that charity (along with my cousin) is who's going with me. I met this lady in the early 90's, and traveled once, to Guatemala, with her. Never got to the village, though.
From there ... who knows where. We'll be playing it totally by ear and by map.
On Friday, I end my California trip, and head back to the Rockies to prepare for my journey.
I've started a blog ... which ... gives truth to who I am, just a little bit, but .... sometimes the truth shall set you free ;-)
http://nbeener.blogspot.com/
I won't be gone until I'm gone, but ... then ... can't be sure how much internet access I'll have, or how often.
I was already medically disabled when MY multi-year traumas hit.
Those events made the medical profoundly worse, and added the C-PTSD to the laundry list of challenges I must navigate.
This trip ... is my Hail Mary Pass.
It may not work, but -- since there IS NO backup plan -- I have to try.
"Mixed emotions" doesn't begin to describe it, but ... onward.
So ... for today ... as always ... I wish you all peace, health, and strength.
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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First, I hope everyone is doing well, and continuing to fight that good fight! Keep up the great work on yourselves; I'm rooting for all of you!So, I started doing therapy at the beginning of the year, when I was in my most depressed state, but with my therapist, I made big changes and steps in the right direction. But, over a month ago, she couldn't take my insurance anymore, and I had to stop...
Do not think of it as your hail Mary pass, because there is time left on the clock. You will need time to adjust to the huge change, (and perhaps the size of the bugs). Then whether this village, or somewhere else down there, becomes your Shangrila or not, this is one clear step away from past trauma and towards a future which holds its own parameters.
A place cannot make or break you David. If this ends up ideal, wonderful! If not, then you just see what seems most logical to do next.
Happy trails to you,
letitbe
I hope you can post lots of photos on your blog and have a grand time.
I'm excited for you as i would for anyone doing this....I think is a good and exciting thing!
Now a day they have internets everywhere.I have a friend who used to go trecking in the Himalayas and he could e.mail me from there.......
So post us your how your trip is going.
Good luck, Dave. It is an awesome world we live in. Congrats on getting to see some of it. May the ugly spots never blind you to the beauty.
Godspeed- Guayaba
One of these days it'll be a one way trip for me, too, and I won't come back. :-) Bon voyage, amigo.
vid's kinda' crappy. work in progress and i'm still composing and playing new music for most of it. it's all a rough draft
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGRboC6EUeE
and yes, i did drink the electric kool-aid :)
best of luck in your travels david, and see you on the other side. save batteries for cameras to record the incredibles.
Letitbe: well said, and ... thanks. Luckily, living in Florida for a few years, and a week in the Amazon taught me allll about big bugs :-) But I agree with what you said. Every word.
In about 2004, I spent 2wks at a Buddhist Monastery. They taught me that happiness is internal, not external. It is a way of being, and not a place.
I asked one particular monk, "If that's so, then why are all of these monasteries located in such amazingly beautiful places ?"
His reply ?
"It doesn't hurt ;-)"
No. It doesn't hurt !
Milla: you hit the nail on the head. I have NEVER had ANY fear/reservations about travel, but this time I do. I HAVE had to tell myself EXACTLY that: FK it ! Thank you !
unomas: if you and I ever had any issues, trust me: I've totally forgotten about them :-) I trust I WILL have internet access. What's possible, though, is that I'll get used to NOT being quite so connected :-) Thank you !
TwilightStar: an adventure is the thing that I most hope for. Some healing ... would be icing on the cake. Thanks so much !
arfie: A traveler. When one talks of travel with ... a traveler ... very little needs to be said. Sort of like the language of PTSD, but ... a topic that's INFINITELY more fun :-) Thank you !!
guayaba: Thank you so much. I can't speak for the other forum members, but ... what I went through, over the last five years ... has me feeling disgustingly selfish -- like I need care more than others, and that others ... will just have to wait.
It's important to me to get back to that core belief that I have: that doing FOR others ... is an absolute win-win. I hope to get back to that place on this trip.
mujicaptsd: Thank you so much, too. I know that many places in Latin America are home/familiar to you.
Didn't know that you'd done this kind of trip, too.
I think I said it before: I know that "home" has a LOT of mixed memories for you, including some exquisite pain. I believe it speaks volumes about YOU, AND about these places in your memory, that you'd love to go back.
All I can say is ... if and when you think you might ... check in with me. I'd be honored to have the opportunity to meet up.
MojoPaw: after the weekend, I'll be "off work," back in my little hotel room, and will have LOTS of time to look at your video -- something I'm very excited about doing. Thanks, in advance, for sharing it. Your very description OF it ... speaks to me in a million ways.
I've got three batteries, a couple of big-capacity SD memory cards, and a very high-capacity external drive. I intend to take pictures of everything I can, but will be trying (against my history) NOT to see THIS trip solely through the lens :-)
Thanks, all. Stay tuned......